My Lila is five. While I have no idea what to do with that, she seems content in her oldness. She wears it well. She doesn't flaunt it, but you can tell she feels just a little bit more grown up. It's a crazy thing to see all of the ways your child becomes a little person. Their likes and dislikes…their dreams and loves…you take it all in and try to remember every last detail. I love birthdays, but there's something really special about your first child's big day. It's a celebration of them and of you entering parenthood all at once. Lila's actual birthday was a tough one. Life got in the way with Evie not feeling well and a host of other random things. And yet, she acted like nothing could change how great it was that this was her day. That sums Lila up. Her spirit and joy never wavers. Here are a few things about her at the age of five...
She's quick to make a joke like her dad. Her sense of humor is intoxicating (like her dad as well).
She's smart in a way that scares me sometimes. I'm afraid that by around the third grade she will be smarter than me. It's a good thing she has the sort of head in the clouds side of her too at times (like her mom).
Speaking of smart, she's reading. Reading as in she went from knowing how to sound out words to reading all of the things. She seems to breeze through the books we have. I have been pinning chapter books for Kindergartners in an effort to step up the game this summer because she loves it so much.
In addition to being smart, she's got quite the creative spirit. She loves art supplies of any kind, coloring, and doing projects of all sorts. I have also been pinning whatever art projects that are new and exciting for the summer in case we have a rainy one again this year.
She's even more cuddly and snuggly at the age of five than she ever has been before. She still loves to sit in your lap, hug, and cozy up on the couch. This is a big bonus for the parents who aren't quite mentally comfortable with their oldest being five already.
She's headstrong in every sense of the word. I hate to say stubborn because that word has such a negative connotation. I would rather she be headstrong and determined than the alternative any day.
She loves soccer, swimming, rock climbing and anything where she can be physically active!
She's never met a stranger. I mean this quite literally. We go to a playground and she assumes every kid there is her friend. Some kids are confused when she walks up and just starts talking to them. But before you know it she has them swinging with her and running around like they've been pals all along. This is my absolute favorite thing about her, and I pray every day that she never loses it.
The weather is screwing with the flow of parenting in most unfortunate ways. Last winter we had no winter. I never once put on a coat. Then, it rained all summer. I wore a bathing suit all of three times. This winter there have been multiple snow/ice storms mixed with one rare day of seventy degrees. But mostly it's been very cold.
As a parent going outside is a clutch part of the day. Especially as a stay at home parent. It's a relief for everyone. It's freedom and messiness and all things nature. There is a revival of the worn out spirit when the children can run free, swing, and ride bikes. It's like a mini getaway that requires almost no effort.
So when weeks and weeks go by where playing outside may happen once or twice, things get hairy. The glamour of being crafty is but a memory. There are only so many times you can build a fort or make cookies. No really. Even for me there is a threshold for the number of times that I can make cookies with small children.
All of this being said, I have begun to reach a point where drawing out the use of imaginations is vital. When we all get restless and the day seems to be caving in I will sit the kids down and have a chat. I will say this to my big blue eyed babies:
"What could you possibly do in this house that would be fun that you never thought of before? Sit here and think on that, and then go do it."
Sometimes they tell me what they are going to do. Sometimes not. Clearly there are rules. For instance, you cannot paint or draw on items other than yourself or paper. And, you cannot break things, hurt anyone, or destroy the house. You know. Obvious stuff. I have only had the above chat a handful of times. Until yesterday it worked like a charm. And even yesterday they followed the rules…technically.
I went to fold some laundry and let their imaginations take over. Usually this involves putting on crazy outfits and pretending to go to the beach. One time they set up a doctor's office in Lila's room and doctored every stuffed animal we own. This is the age where imagination is the most magical part of life. Everything is pretend and silly and wonderful.
Except for when they decide, as they did yesterday, that the toilet was a place to wash things.
What do you do when your almost three year old brings you a handful of sopping wet pacifiers (that she still uses in her bed) and tells you emphatically that she cleaned them all by herself IN THE POTTY?
These moments are the fastest and the easiest to royally screw up. And screw it up I did. I may or may not have sort of freaked out. I plugged up the sink, dumped a bunch of soap in, and frantically told my beaming girl to stick the pacifiers in the sink. I then covered her hands and arms in soap. I asked in a panicked voice what else had gone through the "potty washing station" and her eyes welled up with tears. Had she not done what I asked her to do? Had she not used her brilliant little imagination for fun? Yes. Yes she had. And yet here I was ruining the fun.
Then Lila comes strolling in with a handful of little trinkets that were surely destined for "cleanliness". I quickly said, "Oh no you don't!". She wasn't quite as stunned. In fact, I think I saw a smirk. Evie was the mastermind, but somewhere inside Lila knew this was not a wise choice. She thought nothing of it and ran off to go do something else while I consoled a devastated Evie. She began to tell me how she was trying to help me clean. She began to talk about how the passies were getting so clean and how she was going to dry them off too. She went on and on about how she was pretending that the potty was like a car wash for her toys. Tears streaming she tried to explain her brilliant plan in all of it's glory. I plopped onto the floor and listened knowing that while she spoke I had to figure out how to fix this AND be sure that nothing would ever again be washed in the toilet. In that moment I realized for the millionth time that parenting is more like rocket science or brain surgery without any sort of awards or high pay scales.
Evie and I recovered. I decided to praise her for a job well done, and I apologized for getting upset. I also decided that a lengthy conversation about appropriate cleaning areas in the house was one that required proper prior planning. And, clearly, there was a much needed conversation to be had with Lila about knowing when to speak up about a bad choice being made.
To say that spring and summer can't get here fast enough is quite an understatement. But thank God for entertaining and imaginative children who keep things interesting until playing outside resumes!
This past Friday I spent a lovely day at my friend Meg's house. However, sometime around dinner Lila started telling me over and over again that she was really cold. Lila is never cold. People used to give me funny looks when I would bring her places in the fall/winter without a coat as a toddler. The girl radiates heat. I used to incessantly take her temperature when she was really little because I would snuggle with her and be sure she had a fever. Therefore, for her to be cold for more than five minutes is odd. And then she didn't eat one of her favorite dinners of chicken nuggets and sweet potato fries, and I knew something was up.
Meg took her temperature, and being that she had a slight fever we headed home after dinner.
I am not a rush to the doctor type of parent, and Seth is even less inclined to take himself or our children to the doctor for anything. She had no other symptoms for most of the weekend and her fever never really got worse. She was just sort of dragging and grumpy with a low grade fever.
I suppose this is the kind of sick you want your kid to get. We have been very lucky in the realm of sicknesses in our house. Since Lila's baby days of me taking her temperature all the time (which I finally stopped doing around age two) I can count on one hand how many times I have used the thermometer. My kids never puke. I mean really never. There have been some bouts with coughing, lots of snot and sneezing, and a few terrible diaper incidents. That's about it. We are grateful.
I believe that in parenting one good fortune is often matched with a not so good fortune.
My kids aren't great sleepers. It happens. Seth and I do shockingly well on minimal sleep because our bodies seem trained for it now. That and we are heavily caffeinated people. Lila slept great as a baby, but she stopped napping not long after Evie was born. Evie has always had an aversion to sleep. So one might say we haven't slept well in two and half years.
Again, our kids rarely get really sick. We are grateful.
The thing is, when they do get sick the sleeping portion of life takes a rapid and intense downward spiral.
Here is a rundown of our night last night:
*SIDE NOTE - To add insult to injury Seth and I stay up entirely too late. We are working on it.
11:30 pm - Lila wakes up to go to the bathroom and we go to bed.
11:45 pm - 12:15 am - Lila randomly calls out in her sleep. This is that time during feeling bad where you can't get to the good sleep so you toss and turn and hate life.
12:15 am - Seth says that if Lila keeps randomly waking up he will go sleep in her bed and she can sleep with me. If all three of us sleep in the bed no one gets much sleep because Lila sleeps like all of these combined…
12:30 am - Lila walks into our room just as Seth has fallen asleep. I am still wide awake from the previous garbled frustrations emanating from Lila's room. She climbs in the bed in between us but refuses to get under the blankets. Do you know how hard it is to get comfortable under blankets when the person in the middle is on top of them???
12:45 am - I am not going to sleep. No one is. Seth gets up to go to Lila's room, but I stop him. He begins to protest that he's fine with sleeping in her tiny twin bed. However, I have spent the past thirty minutes not sleeping trying to figure out the best solution for everyone to get more sleep. This has become a science for me. It's like a challenge to see how I can configure things so that we all win. I give him this quick summary of how things are going down:
"You and Lila sleep in our bed, and I will sleep in Lila's bed. That way, when Evie wakes up at 5 am (per her usual) I can go grab her before she wakes you guys up (he starts to attempt to disagree with me but I keep talking). If I sleep in here with Lila and you don't wake up to Evie yelling for someone at 5am (per his usual) then Lila will wake up at 5am when I go get Evie and all will be MISERABLE."
With that I grab my pillow and head to Lila's room.
Do you want to know what happened? Lila woke Seth up a few times during the night but not for long. Evie let everyone sleep until SEVEN AM. I also believe that when one kid is having a tough time the other one subconsciously knows it and either helps or hurts the situation immensely. Lila and Seth woke up at almost 8am and Lila was late for school. But that doesn't matter. PEOPLE GOT SLEEP.
Sometimes the stars align. When this happens you thank the Heavens for small favors. OR, you pat yourself on the back for mastering the sleep science that is your family.
I interrupt our regularly scheduled hump day hollas to recap my day.
Morning went per our usual. The coffee was flowing and everyone was pretty chill. Seth headed to work and the girls decided it was makeover mommy day. This happens once a month or so, and I try to really let them do what they want. Lila takes her time on my hair while Evie could care less. Then I bring out the makeup and voila!
Can you tell there is no color to any of my makeup? Apparently I like the drab and dull look. All these years I kept thinking I was trying to look natural. But, when someone covers your face in what you usually use for eye shadow you begin to ponder your choices. I mean, can you tell how thick that layer is on my forehead? I was wondering why Lila kept putting more and more on in the same spot. Apparently she just couldn't see it! Speaking of choices, I made the conscious decision to put this picture on this blog. I'm going with the sentiment that we are all lovely at all times of the day.
Anyway, I tried not to sit too long like this for fear of my face becoming one enormous zit. As I stood to get in the shower my phone rang, and in big letters it said LIVSEY.
I used to teach at Livsey Elementary school. It's half a mile from our house. I answered to hear the familiar and friendly voice of the wonderful woman who works in the office. At this point I'm clueless as to why she is calling me. She cheerfully exclaims, "someone backed out of Pre-K and Lila's name was drawn! Do you guys want the spot???". I'm sorry what?
She frantically tells me that she has to know today...like now. I ask her if I can call Seth and promise to call her back pronto.
Long story short, Lila starts Pre-K TOMORROW. Back in April Lila's name was not drawn in the lottery for this class. We were all set for her to start on September 4th at the church preschool she's been going to for the past two years.
Honestly, I'm proud of myself at the end of this day. For the emotional roller coaster of a wreck I've become I'd say I did a swell job! That and my type A personality kept it's cool. I sat there in my makeup and thought about how to talk to Lila about this without making it seem as overwhelming as it was feeling for me. Seth and I took her up to the school, met the teacher, and walked around. She was pumped. Nervous, but pumped.
I ran to Target after Seth got home from work to somehow get what was needed and make this not feel so rushed. Sadly, Target was an explosion of leftover school supplies that no one wants. It's a good thing all I needed was a lunchbox and a thermos. I wanted to get Lila a new first day of school outfit and came across a shirt with the print above that says "Draw Lovely Things" and started to cry...in Target...with a cart full of over priced snacks and food receptacles.
So many things are racing through my brain today. Of course, the majority of this is normal. The not so normal part is that most people have all summer to sort of mull it over. Here is what I'm now digesting...
1) My one and only first child is going to school tomorrow. Like at a real school where she will be gone a lot of the day and learning from someone other than me.
2) My girls won't spend most of every day completely attached to each other like they have been all summer. I have a feeling I'm going to hear a lot of "where's Lila?" tomorrow.
3) I will be spending more one on one time with Evie than I ever have before. This part is thrilling...although I am nervous that Evie will find me to be a distant second to Lila in the realm of playmate.
4) We missed the first day of school. The real first day of school was Monday. I always loved the first day of school rush as a kid and as a teacher. I know there are many more to come though!
5) My sweet blondie has no idea what's going on. Or at least that's how it feels. I tried to explain it as a school that you go to when you get a little bigger. She just keeps asking if she can play there.
Tonight I am excited for her and sad for myself...but only a little. I am hopeful for what's to come for my girl and her bright little self. My heart hurts for Evie because she just can't understand why she can't go too. At the same time, I can't wait to see what it's like to spend so much time with just her. Most of all I'm thankful for change, new experiences, and the chance to see my kids grow no matter how fast it's happening.
I would guess that most parents of little ones will tell you that the best part of parenting is experiencing new things for the first time with your child. This could range from blowing the first bubble themselves to stepping onto the school bus that first day of school. Every single day holds a new experience and a new chance to see it through the eyes of your child. Of course, I could never even begin to list all of the new experiences with my kids here. But, I think some of the not so every day things are worth documenting.
Lila had a couple of firsts this weekend. When I say first, I actually mean second or third. At this age these are the first times where she may remember these things. She has definitely stayed in a hotel before. She has actually been in a wedding before. However, now she knows what a wedding really is and why you would need to stay in a hotel sometimes. Therefore, we will call them "sort of firsts".
My mom's cousin's daughter (my second cousin?) got married just outside of Montgomery, Alabama this past weekend. Lila was beyond thrilled to go for many reasons. She adores my cousin's daughter, Anna Kate, who was also going to the wedding. Plus, recently Lila has been asking to look at pictures of our wedding while telling me she wishes she could have gone to it. Staying in the hotel with just Vivi (my mom) and I was an added perk she didn't realize was going to happen. The wedding was so perfect and beautiful, and Lila really enjoyed herself. I cannot advocate enough, if you have more than one child, to do things with each individual child as much as you can. Seth got to spend a lot of the weekend with Evie just the two of them. Plus, Evie got some one on one Grammy time with his mom. Every time we do something like this I always feel like both girls get a great deal out of it.
Anyway, here are a few highlights...
1) The wedding was outside. Lila spent half the ceremony trying to stand in her chair to see "the princess". When the groomsmen came out she quietly whispered, "mommy, there are all of the princes!!!". Regardless of how much I discuss weddings with her and show her pictures, anyone dressed up is a prince or a princess.
2) The ceremony and reception were at the same place. It was one of those old farm house type places with beautiful grounds. Every time we went in the house to go to the bathroom she wanted to walk around and look in every room. She wanted me to tell her who lived in each room and where they were so she could meet them. I tried to explain that it was just a place to have weddings now, but she wasn't having it.
3) She found it so entertaining that she got to sleep on the couch that was also a bed.
4) As you can see in the picture above, we ordered room service! This absolutely was a real first for Lila. It was done more out of necessity than a strong desire to pay $20 for cereal, fruit, muffins, and coffee. Lila wakes up READY TO EAT. She also woke up at 6:45 am. Let's just say between Vivi and I there was no rushing to get out of the hotel and go find some food. Morning people we are not.
So while all of the baby and toddler firsts are magical and amazing, the big girl "sort of firsts" are such a treat as well!
In my life before husband and kids I was so much more on top of things. Everything was consistently in order. I did things like go to the dentist every six months, give blood on the regular, and balance my checkbook. Now, I feel reeeeaaaalllyyy good about myself if I get the kids to school on time with all of their clothes on and their lunch is actually inside their backpack. We are talking about preschool here people. It's not that hard.
One thing I still aim for is punctuality. I hate to be late. HATE TO BE LATE.
One would wonder how Seth and I work. Seth is the opposite of on time. Since marrying me he has stepped up his game in this department. But, he is still usually late to some degree.
One thing I know about marriage is that I know who I married. Nowhere in my brain did a little voice tell me that if I married him he would suddenly be on time. As I've said before, that kind of expectation benefits no one. I spent a great deal of our dating years waiting for him to get to my house and pick me up. Therefore, it's been no surprise that I still wait and look out the window and grumble a little. It doesn't matter though. I would wait for him forever.
For the record, he puts up with me in the morning. Pretty sure we are even.
Anyway, I am explaining all of this to now discuss Lila's ballet recital.
Usually I get over it if we are late. I get irritated and distressed, but I come around. The afternoon of Lila's ballet recital went from grumbly, to super angry, to kind of funny. Kind of.
The babysitter for Evie gets here at five. I texted Seth at a quarter past four and said, "you are going to be here AT FIVE right?". Of course he says yes. Five fifteen rolls around and we frantically get in the car leaving the tutu, tap shoes, and ballet shoes on the counter. Therefore, it's pushing five thirty when we get onto the highway with everything we need and Lila is supposed to be there in ten minutes. The recital was scheduled to start at six. It was rush hour and we had to get to the depths of Buckhead. Pretty sure I texted everyone that was going and said we weren't going to make it only to realize they were already there.
Mind you, there was a strong possibility that Lila wasn't even going to participate. She hadn't been an active part of the class for a month yet insisted on doing the recital. While sitting in traffic I told myself it didn't matter if we didn't make it. Except that my beautiful ballerina was sitting all done up in her carseat grinning from ear to ear.
As it turns out, we got there after six. But it didn't matter. She was in the fifth group to perform and it suddenly felt like we hadn't missed a beat. In the panic to park in the most over used elementary school in Atlanta, we left the big camera in the car. Hence, the picture at the top of the post. That's truly the only decent phone picture I have. That is her plie plus a really silly face! It's a good thing there will be other occasions to get good pictures at events like this. At any rate, that little blondie bun on her head and the look of pride that she danced on the stage are forever etched in my brain.
Aside from the random tidbit here and there I haven't done an update on the girls in what feels like forever. So much has changed that this post feels massive. Their little hearts exude loveliness all over me every single day, and I feel the need to show that off a little.
Lila...
...the fashionista. After the consignment sale I had her try on everything I bought while Evie was napping. She (we) had so much fun that I just wanted to take her shopping immediately and have her try stuff on. I would actually do that if she wouldn't be heartbroken that we didn't buy it all.
...the student. Lila officially goes to school five days a week now and truly loves it. That only just started two weeks ago and it honestly doesn't feel that different from three days. We made that choice in preparation for next school year where she will either do five half days at the church preschool or five full school days at the public school in pre-K. Yep. This is happening people. I AM NOT READY.
...the dancer. Lila spent the entire first two months of the school year telling us she needed to be in the after school ballet class. We were hesitant for various reasons, but finally we caved and signed her up. Wouldn't you know she thought it was the greatest thing that ever happened to her. That is until about two weeks ago. Suddenly she was much less interested and just wanted to watch instead of participate. The recital is next week! She tells me all day long that she does really want to do the recital. This is the world of a fickle three year old. We will see what happens.
...the almost four year old. She says the phrase "on my four years old birthday" at least five times a day. This is either in reference to something she thinks she will magically be capable of doing come the ripe old age of four, or something she wants for her birthday. I lost track of what she wants weeks ago. At this age she is well beyond the difficult times of tantrums, trying time out, and potty training. That span of 18 months (ish) to about three and a half for us was tough. I read in Parents magazine this month that when you feel like you have a "difficult" child you are actually feeling the beginnings of amazing and beneficial qualities down the line. I wouldn't call Lila a difficult child. Every kid has their strengths and weaknesses. Lila just knew really well how to push the limits sometimes. But, every time she did in the back of my mind I was saying a prayer that she never loses that determination and fire. She still has those things, but she is more aware of her actions and reactions. Long ago we put into place ways to help her calm down or figure out a situation that is tough. It's taken a while, but she uses those ideas all the time now. Sometimes she tells me she's doing it and sometimes I just know. It's very refreshing when the way you parent really feels like it's working!
...the big sister. I get choked up on this one. Lila is a lover, not a fighter. But, she needs control and wants things to go her way. When Evie doesn't follow the path Lila so carefully lays out for her Lila becomes a massive puddle on the floor. She's heartbroken on the very rare occasions that Evie doesn't want to emulate her every move. I find this to be so endearing I can't even stand it. At the same time, she tries so hard to let it be Evie's choice. She will take Evie's hand and say, "Evie do you want to do my hair?" and Evie jumps at the chance. I spy on them all the time and Lila never ceases to amaze me with her kindness.
...the out of the blue jokester. Recently she will say or do things that crack both of us up unexpectedly. She is laughing because she now knows how funny she can be. I am laughing because she seems genuinely proud and shocked when it happens (and because it was funny)! The other day she actually tried to blame a toot on me. She was so tickled with herself that I couldn't object because I was laughing so hard. Wonder who taught her that?
Sorry for the lengthy post! Thanks for letting me indulge in my big girl for a bit.
While I may still be stuck in time, my header shouldn't be. But it is. Honestly, that's more because I have big plans of redoing this blog. I have all of these ideas and hopes for it, but I just need to sit down and do it (and do it right). I daydream about sitting at a coffee shop with my laptop while the girls are at "school". Instead, I go Christmas shopping. Or clean my house. Or complete one of the other tasks I have lined up for myself. Plus, I really need some new computer software to get the ball rolling. Until then you will just have to keep looking at those cute little chickies as they were over two months ago.
I guess I could update you on HOW they are actually doing though! Here goes...
I should be going to bed. I keep feeling the blogging urge. However, for whatever reason all of my blogging thoughts are in a jumble. There are things I am working on. BIG things. No, I am not making a baby. That is not one of the things. Because that would just be crazy town at this particular moment.
The big things are far reaching, distant dreams. Do you have any of those? Can you see yourself experiencing the success of a dream? I had a daydream about that very thing. I daydreamed about my dream coming true and what that would feel like. I used to daydream about my babies being born. It's a zillion times better in real life. Fingers crossed someday this will be too.
Until then, here we are. You waiting to see what I could possibly blog about after the last post. Me waiting to see if what I blog about is ever going to fill the void a little. Let's give it a go...starting small of course.
Lila still wears pull ups to bed. I fear she may go to Kindergarten doing this. But, it's a habit. Like all habits it will be hard to shake. Last night she woke up because the pull up had leaked. She was very upset about this. After all the sheet changing and pajama changing we were both wide awake. She was upset that I was telling her she had to go back to bed.
Anyway, today we were sitting on the couch while Evie was napping and I asked her if she was tired. She said that she was because she didn't get good sleeps. She told me that her "eyes had drips" and that she couldn't go back to sleep last night. I tried to explain that the drips were called tears, but she wasn't having it. It's so brilliant how the mind of a little kid works. Of course they should be called drips right?
In my daydream my eyes were dripping and Lila made me think of it during this little conversation on the couch. She doesn't understand crying because you are happy yet. Here's to hoping that she gets to see that kind of crying from mommy instead of the other kind in the not too distant future.
What you read when you come to this blog is essentially what's on my brain.
Now you get to see my brain at 6 am.
This week was a turning over a new leaf week. You know, eat all the crap you want over the weekend so that you can start fresh on Monday kind of a week? I can't even begin to count how many times I've done that. At some point it has got to stick right?
One of my goals for this new leaf turning is to wake up before my kids every day. This, in turn, means going to bed earlier. One might say, "Jana, this is your only job (sort of)...why on Earth can't this be an easy accomplishment?". Well, it's not. I am not a morning person and will never be. I am the definition of a night owl. I believe you can make positive changes to yourself, but at your core you are what you are. Plus, the inconsistency of sleep begs my brain to think I need every possible minute of it I can get.
For instance, I went to bed before 11pm last night. Lila is sick and sort of called out a couple of times but then went right back to sleep. Mind you, I am also a very light sleeper. So these little yelps woke me. Inconsistency. Then, around some late hour like 1 am she apparently had some awful dream. She was talking about swimming or something and I can't really be sure what happened because we were both so half asleep.
And here's the difficulty of blogging in the AM. We have a visitor....
Does it look like she slept much?
Anyway, needless to say I ended up in the bed with Lila until she went back to sleep. This took an awfully long time. She just couldn't seem to settle which means I spent over an hour dozing. Dozing is not to be confused with sleeping. Any parent who rocks the baby and tries to "sleep" in the chair can tell you that.
I eventually got back in my bed and when the alarm went off at 6am I had a serious conversation with myself. I pro'd and con'd the getting up early in a weak attempt to stay asleep. I seem to go back to the same thought every time. If I get up now or get up later I'm still going to be really sleep today. Might as well just get up.
I had a lot more to say today, but I hear the littlest Burrow stirring now too. Maybe you'll get lucky and get a double dose today. WAIT! It's Holla Hump Day. Therefore, you will for sure see me later.
Lila wanted to type her name here. A special treat! You get a goodbye "signature" from both of us!
I learned a lot about my littlest girl today. Truthfully, I learned a lot in general today...
1) Public offices are small versions of hell.
2) Evie really and truly hates the Ergo now. It's not the Ergo's fault. She also hates the car seat, shopping carts, and the stroller. This would be sort of manageable if it wasn't for that scream...
3) Lila is ready to go to the beach RIGHT NOW. She cried and screamed about the fact that we weren't going today for over an hour.
4) Evie has the potential to be an Olympian.
I made a terribly awful, no good, very bad choice today. I chose to physically go to the vital records office to get certified copies of my girls birth certificates instead of mailing in for them. It's pretty close to my house. I ignorantly thought I would swing by and pick them up. Let's just say that place is my own private hell. I walked around wearing the Ergo without actually wearing the baby. I sweat through my clothes in a matter of seconds. I fed my kids more in one hour than they eat in an entire day. I mouthed off to a "security guard" who then ended up helping me. Epic fail. Oh and the scream. God gave her that scream solely to teach me what it really means to be patient.
After this failure of an event we got in the car with everyone in tears. That's when it became clear that Lila was very confused. It seems she thought we were going from this hell to the beach. We have been talking about the beach for a week. I'm not sure why she thought today was the day. Nothing I said helped. I told her we could make a chart of the "sleeps" we have left until we go. I told her if we went today Daddy, Grammy, and Levi could't go because they are working. I told her we still had to pack or we would be swimming in our sweaty clothes. It didn't matter. She had reached the land of no return after holding it in during vital records hell.
Fast forward to dinner time. I am spent. The kids are finally back to normal. Seth gets home and we are eating. He suggests we go hike Stone Mountain. I love this man. Like, I really love him. It's almost 7pm (bedtime ish), we have been to hell and back, and this is the first time I have felt normal all day. He is the only person that can survey this and suggest something CRAZY like hiking Stone Mountain. He gets away with it because when he does things like that they typically turn out pretty fantastic.
Of we go. He grabs the Ergo and I chuckle. That's right honey. I chuckled. You were so cute with your optimism and good intentions.
Lila is ecstatic. This has seemingly distracted her from needing to be at the beach NOW. Evie quickly shows Seth what she's made of. Within ten minutes she's walking the mountain with us.
No really. Evie hiked half of half of the mountain. I'm not sure how else to describe it. That may not sound like a lot, but she's 14 months old for God's sake! That same fierceness and intensity she carries with her during tough moments comes out just as much during the good times too. I knew that already, but this was the first time I've seen it in this way. She didn't want me to hold her hand or hold her at all. She got red in the face and sweaty but smiled as people giggled at her when they hiked by her. At some point Seth went ahead with Lila. I almost got the sense that Evie was trying so hard to catch up.
As I watched her determination the rest of the day melted away. It's funny how much of an emotional roller coaster this parenting gig can be.
THANK YOU Seth for dragging us to the mountain ;-)
Last night my cousins Olivia and Audrey came over to spend the night. Olivia is about to be a sophomore in high school and Audrey is in middle school. They came to hang out with my girls while I get some stuff done before we leave for the beach on Saturday (eeeeekkkkk!!!!).
Lila LOVES having visitors. She wants them to play with her and talk to her the entire time they are here. She doesn't ever want them to leave, and she wants me out of the picture.
This has happened in the past where if a babysitter is coming or she is going to Grammy's she wants to make sure I won't be there. I get it. I'm the main disciplinarian and she thinks I will ruin her fun. Point taken. But, typically she still creeps back to my lap pretty quickly if I do stick around. And, more often than not she still wants me there after ten to fifteen minutes.
That was not really the case today.
When she woke up this morning it was like Christmas. Olivia and Audrey were still trying to sleep and Lila was really good about letting them for as long as she could take it. Audrey woke up first and played with the girls until I finished cleaning up breakfast. Olivia then woke up and I pretty much didn't see Lila the rest of the day. When I would ask her for a hug or (gasp) a kiss she would act as though I had just asked her the most embarrassing question ever. Is this for real? Does this really happen at age THREE??? I mean, I know Olivia and Audrey are way cooler than me, but come on. We should have YEARS before she doesn't want mommy to love on her in public right?
Ugh.
There came a point where she got really tired. She was coloring for the eightieth time with Olivia and Olivia said she just started quietly crying. She brought her to me and she sat in my lap for about five minutes. She just sat there. Maybe she knew I needed her to show me some love. Maybe she knew she had gone a little too long without it. Or maybe she was just tired. Regardless, I needed it.
I know what it feels like to worship your mama. I know that intense feeling to the core of my being. And I know that Lila feels it too. But I also know that she feels a strong connection with the other women in her life that love her so much. How lucky are we both that those women (or soon to be women) are here and present in so many ways?
Thank you girls for loving my girls. Thank you Uncle Brant and Aunt Elizabeth for raising such good examples. And thank you for giving me a day to be on top of things for once. Even if it meant realizing that I am not the end all and be all for my first baby every second of every day. It's a scary place to be but a good one.
Oh, and Aunt Elizabeth I am REALLY sorry that I took zero pictures. I'm kicking myself about it as we speak.
...my family at the lake last weekend. First and foremost to Laura and her family for hosting us in their lake house. We had the best time! To everyone else, thank you for not making me feel like a chicken with it's head cut off. I know that's how I looked and I appreciate you just going with it.
...the lady at Trader Joe's who tried to help me find some obscure items while both of my girls did everything they could to distract her. Okay, so maybe they were only distracting me. Regardless, she stood strong and got me what I needed.
...my friends for overlooking my inability to interact with adults sometimes. I feel like I stand in a stupor when I'm around adults without my children. It's like I forget how to just talk instead of trying to manage someone while talking. Must work on this!
Update on the Burrow Girls:
Lila
Lila LOVES the movie Tangled. Seth's mom went on the hunt for all possible Disney princess movies for Lila's birthday. Unfortunately, some are very hard to come by. Tangled was really the only princess movie that we have found and Lila can pretty much recite whole sections of the movie. It's especially funny to hear her talk like Mother Gothel. She will randomly say, "you are never leaving this tower! EVER!". Quite dramatic.
She also recently loves when Evie follows her around. Before she just kind of tolerated it. Now I think she has realized that Evie is obsessed with her. She talks to Evie like I talk to Evie. She calls her baby and tells her it's going to be okay if Evie gets upset. LOVE THIS.
Today I officially moved almost all of Lila's clothes to areas within her reach. She has always been very picky about what she wears and has always pretty much picked for herself with my help. For a long time I tried to be a little too controlling of this. Today I decided I need to let go a little. I put outfits that go together in one drawer, shirts/shorts in another, and all of her dresses are still hanging in the closet (for lack of anywhere else to put them). We discussed it and then she chose what to wear. Her choice included shorts with flowers and butterflies and a shirt with butterflies. Completely mismatched but in her mind they matched because of the butterflies. She tells me at least once a day that she loves butterflies. LOVE THIS.
Lastly, I'm so enjoying this age because she is so enthralled with so many things. She doesn't do something for just a few minutes anymore. She really immerses herself in what she's doing and takes her time. I love to eavesdrop on her while she is taking her dolls to the park (or the den). I love to hear what she's saying to Evie when she thinks I'm not listening. I love how she will spend an hour doing one big puzzle and the determination she shows.
Evie
Evie has a lot of new words. Well, chances are she has had some of these words for a little while and I haven't made note of them. So here's the comprehensive list...
Ma eee - Molly (she's says it so similarly to the way Lila used to say it)
go - also directed at Molly or at me when she wants me to push her in the wagon, run after her, or move in general
some/too - Both used to either get food or do the same thing Lila is doing.
toe - She LOVES her feet
shoe - She LOVES shoes. About eighty times a day she brings me shoes to put on her. I say, "sit down" and she plops down with a foot in the air. LOVE THIS. It's especially fun when the shoe is not her's and obviously does not fit. She gets very mad when they don't stay on!
cup - She says this over and over until someone gets her something to drink.
K - This is a new one that means milk. She just says the K part if she wants milk instead of saying cup.
mommy, daddy, ya ya - She yells mommy when she wants to get out of the bed or is mad, she says daddy when he gets home, and she says ya ya all the time because she's obsessed with her.
side - This is for outside which she simply cannot get enough of.
ook - Book. Sometimes she just says the K part again.
ball - She loves to throw a ball and then chase it! I feel bad, but playing fetch with her is so much fun.
poop - She says it so softly and in sort of a sneaky way that makes me laugh.
Hi - She literally says hi to everyone!
tank too - Thank you :-)
Other than words, Evie has all the blessings of being the second child. If it were up to her she would probably start using the potty soon. She "brushes" her teeth and washes her hands with Lila which is too stinking cute. Overall, if Lila's doing it Evie wants to be right there with her.
Evie also loves to be chased. In fact, if I say no to something she is doing she will do it again or run off just so you will come get her to make her stop. She just laughs and laughs as you run after her. This is probably not the best thing because I find it to be beyond adorable so I give in and chase her. She then giggles like crazy and I forget that I was trying to stop her from doing something.
Alright, I'm off to bed! Thanks to those who found yesterday's post humorous. I appreciate that I can provide some comic relief now and then ;-)
In case you didn't get enough of them in the monster picture post, I wanted to give an actual update about my girls. I feel like I just did one of these not that long ago, but things happen so quickly!
Lila
New do
In true three year old fashion Lila has a serious case of verbal diarrhea. That sounds awful, but I mean it in the best way possible. I've had a lot of experience with kids in my life. This is the mark of a true three year old. It's like they wake up one day and realize that they have so many complete thoughts about so many things. AND they simultaneously realize that they can say all of those thoughts at once at any given moment. I plan to get this on video. Or, if you really want to see her in action just stop by. It's an all day event. She did this before turning three. But just in the past week it has become non-stop.
Along those same lines, a lot of her talking involves giving the order of things. I know I do this with her a lot so that she knows what to expect. However, now when I do it she repeats it back to me. Then, if someone else is around she repeats it again to them. Sometimes she repeats it a fourth time for good measure.
Beyond the verbal expressiveness her imagination seems to be in overdrive as well. Of course, I've seen glimpses of it all along. Now the consistency and intensity is there. Our morning routine consists of eating breakfast and then going in the playroom and playing until Evie takes her morning nap. I slowly drink my coffee and let them sort of do what they want. Sometimes they want me involved and sometimes they don't. But I love just sitting and watching. Anyway, the other day Lila decided that it was my birthday. Her birthday party is coming up and we just had Evie's. She has party on the brain. She wanted to have a party for me. Here's the result:
The empty space is where I was sitting. She kept telling me some of it was cake, cupcakes, and presents. I wasn't allowed to "open" or "eat" anything until she was done.
Then she said all of the dress up clothes had to be out for the people to wear at the party. However, the people that were at the party (Evie and I) weren't allowed to wear any of it.
Again, the discussion and imagination aspect has been there for a while. The change is that this was a two hour event. She meticulously placed the items. She tried SO hard to be patient when Evie or Molly plowed over them.
The loyal readers of this blog may remember that Lila took survival swim lessons last year. With ISR (Infant Swimming Resource) you are supposed to take a refresher course each year. Lila started her refresher weeks ago and then she got sick. We started up again last week when I got sick. All of last week Seth took Lila to the lessons bright and early every day. By the end of the week he showed me the below video and I remembered why we started all of this in the first place. I am so proud of her. You will probably watch this video and think it's not that big of a deal. Especially if you know a little swimmer yourself. There really is quite a lot of work that goes into it to ensure that your child can save themselves in a life or death situation. She has worked so hard to get to this point!
Post swim lesson nap (she hasn't napped in months)
In general Lila is high energy, high enthusiasm all the time. She screams about everything in a way that is overwhelming. However, it puts a smile on my face that she feels excited enough about everything to scream about it. We tried getting her to find another way to express her excitement, but then she would just scream because we were asking her not to. We decided the screaming just out of sheer joy was better.
She is still the pickiest eater ever. Her height to weight ratio at her three year well check was actually on the very low end of the scale. I'm not going to feed her a bunch of crap so that she will eat. But, even when I do give in to the nasty food with her she doesn't really eat it. Community Q is glorious food and she ate the bread. She didn't even eat the fries. Just the bread. Not to worry. Evie helped her out ;-)
Lila's current great loves include:
- reading to Evie - she has all of the Sandra Boynton books memorized!
- putting the laundry away
- tending to our vegetable garden (even though she won't eat anything out of it)
- dressing herself in the most random and mismatched outfits
- running on "tracks" which are courses I draw in chalk on the driveway
- video chatting with aunt Sara
- watching videos of herself and Evie on my phone
- Gotye, Karmin, and a little Michael Jackson
- going to the playground and the "Botanibal Gardens"
Evie
There's lots of big stuff happening in Evie's world. I will get to the milestones in a minute. First, I want to chat about her in general. Evie is like a little explosion of sunshine all the time. Her personality is so intense in so many ways I don't even know where to start. She seems to feel and do things with such intensity that sometimes I can't keep up. Just this morning out of nowhere she started crying and put her head on the floor like the world was ending. I was sitting right next to her and I still have no idea what happened. That's really nothing new though. When she gets upset you just kind of have to watch out and let it pass.
Beyond normal tough feelings, she gets so excited and happy about so many things. I love to see her little face light up over something new she accomplishes or something Lila does. She's a daredevil in a way that I am not at all used to. At this age Lila was happy to sit and stare at you and play with toys or walk around in the yard. Evie wants to be everywhere all the time. Her first instinct is to lift a leg and try to get on top of something. She desperately wants to wash her hands standing on the stool in the bathroom like Lila does. She wants to get on the potty. She wants to get in the potty. She wants to get on tables and in the dishwasher. She has already gotten onto our Little Tikes tower and slide on our deck by herself. This took Lila and Carson much longer to accomplish. But then I am told that the second child progresses much faster. Technically, she probably feels like the third child so this isn't so surprising.
That being said, I'm happy to announce that walking is now her preferred mode of getting around.Every day she crawls a little bit less.
Evie also has more words! I am looking forward to this for her. She refuses to sign, but Lila did too. Not sure what the reason for that aversion is in my children, but it makes me sad. Not only because I think sign language is awesome, but because when Evie can't express what she wants or needs she grunts and screams loudly. Are we noticing a theme here?
Anyway, the complete list of words so far:
- Ya Ya -
Still Lila
- OK -
I have a habit of saying "it's okay" if something is wrong. She had a really bad diaper rash this week and that's when she started saying it. It's honestly really heartbreaking. She says it to calm herself down now and it's more like "aaahhhh kkkkkkk". But, sometimes she says it in response to something I have said and then she smiles because she knows she said something I understand. I love that.
- Molly -
She actually said Molly for the first time today! Molly follows me EVERYWHERE so today when I went to get Evie from her second nap Molly was right behind me. Standing in her bed she yelled Molly and was beyond proud of herself when I freaked out.
- Go -
What she used to call Molly. I am not a bad dog parent. I just don't love being followed 99% of the day. Let's just say I am not graceful so this makes for a dangerous situation.
- Cup -
I tried for a while to get her to say milk but she wasn't having it. I didn't even try for cup. It just happened somehow. But I'll take it. Knowing when she wants a drink is clutch.
- Mama -
She used to say Mama a lot, but now she really only says it when she's having a hard time going to sleep. And even then it seems that it's being replaced with aaaahhhhh kkkkkk until I go in and rock her.
Evie's current great loves include:
- Lila counting her toes. It happened a few times in the bathtub and now she wants Lila to do it every time they take a bath. It is seriously the cutest. freaking. thing. ever. She sticks her chubby little foot in the air and gets that pleased as punch look on her face before the counting even starts. I count her toes too, but nothing provides that look of awe and sheer happiness the way Lila does.
- Lila in general. She doesn't love when Lila won't let her have something, but other than that she thinks Lila hung the moon. If only Lila knew...
- Going outside. If we even step outside to get the mail I need to be prepared to stay out there for a while.
- Food - Evie is in the stage where she will eat anything and everything. I forgot how much of a bottomless pit babies can be at this age. I LOVE THIS. No guessing. No wasting. Just good old fashioned eating.
- Sandra Boynton books. Those are her favorite. She like Goodnight Moon and a few others, but the Boynton books always make her smile.
- She loves the playground and the botanical gardens too. This goes along with the being able to walk and the being outside. It's like Christmas any time we go somewhere outside that has things to climb on.
Alright, now that I've stayed up too late with another lengthy post about my children I will go. Holla Hump day is back tomorrow. Don't miss it!!!
...for the post with the most random assortment of pictures.
I feel very behind. I scroll through the videos and pictures on my phone and realize I want it all on here. But if I do that what we end up with is a big fat post of random nonsense. Sound good? Okay, let's get started.
Wait, here are a few things you should know first:
1) We have a new family member. Oddly, he does not have a name yet. First one to name the abnormally large bear gets a big ol' pat on the back!
2) Evie is pretty much walking. Unfortunately, she refuses to do it on command so there is no actual video of the unassisted walking yet. But, I will catch her when she least expects it. She's perfected walking in circles though...
T
3) We have been sick. For forever. No really. Lila and Evie finished a round of antibiotics over the weekend and I honestly feel like they are worse. Evie is destined for tubes but can't be seen at the ENT until the 12th. Seth just has the lingering cold and I'm pretty sure if I cough one more night I might just give up sleeping altogether. Who needs it anyway right? Our family is currently the definition of a hot mess. Don't let the pictures of the weekend fool you. We simply just had to get out of the house.
4) We spent an entire lovely day at Seth's mom's pool with some friends and I didn't take a single picture. Lila spent half the time in the pool and half the time inside watching movies because she would get tired so easily. Maybe it was a bad idea to do the pool all day, but I really feel like she was going stir crazy.
5) It should be noted that I will not be watching Carson next year. I have very mixed emotions about this, but it's the right choice for us right now. It's only fitting that this gigantic picture post start with these three friends that love each other so very much. Enjoy!
Don't tell Katie, but I may steal Carson and take this show on the road...
Mother's Day/ Lila's birthday. I adore this picture. The first time I took Lila to the Children's museum she loved these gears. My little Tinkerbell.
Evie loved the moon sand. She loved trying to sneak a bite of it too (hence the smirk).
She also enjoyed more of the climbing and less of the actual manipulation of the activities.
Introduction of our new family member care of Uncle Levi. Evie was smitten from the minute he entered the room.
Poppy gave Lila her first American Girl Doll...a bitty baby! She came complete with a baby carrier. Lila named her Lucy and then changed it to Lizzie. And now I'm not entirely sure which it really is.
Vivi reading to Lila before bed...
...while Grammy reads to Evie.
The beginning of the sickness.
Being silly
She randomly loves on him and does her mmmmaaaa sound for giving a kiss.
Trying to feel better.
Don't mess with this one!
Nope, not better.
Definitely not better. And no, I did not place the bear on top of her. The girls had gotten a little rough trying to jump on him so he was taking a nap on the couch. She crawled under him to rest as well.
I started a busy bag group!
Making the swap!
I'd say job well done!
Atlanta Botanical Gardens Memorial Day weekend!
Had enough of the walking.
Don't blink! This is Lila in this same spot two years ago (sniff sniff).
