Monday, July 23, 2012

A hard day... the best way possible.

Last night my cousins Olivia and Audrey came over to spend the night. Olivia is about to be a sophomore in high school and Audrey is in middle school. They came to hang out with my girls while I get some stuff done before we leave for the beach on Saturday (eeeeekkkkk!!!!).

Lila LOVES having visitors. She wants them to play with her and talk to her the entire time they are here. She doesn't ever want them to leave, and she wants me out of the picture.

This has happened in the past where if a babysitter is coming or she is going to Grammy's she wants to make sure I won't be there. I get it. I'm the main disciplinarian and she thinks I will ruin her fun. Point taken. But, typically she still creeps back to my lap pretty quickly if I do stick around. And, more often than not she still wants me there after ten to fifteen minutes.

That was not really the case today.

When she woke up this morning it was like Christmas. Olivia and Audrey were still trying to sleep and Lila was really good about letting them for as long as she could take it. Audrey woke up first and played with the girls until I finished cleaning up breakfast. Olivia then woke up and I pretty much didn't see Lila the rest of the day. When I would ask her for a hug or (gasp) a kiss she would act as though I had just asked her the most embarrassing question ever. Is this for real? Does this really happen at age THREE??? I mean, I know Olivia and Audrey are way cooler than me, but come on. We should have YEARS before she doesn't want mommy to love on her in public right?


There came a point where she got really tired. She was coloring for the eightieth time with Olivia and Olivia said she just started quietly crying. She brought her to me and she sat in my lap for about five minutes. She just sat there. Maybe she knew I needed her to show me some love. Maybe she knew she had gone a little too long without it. Or maybe she was just tired. Regardless, I needed it.

I know what it feels like to worship your mama. I know that intense feeling to the core of my being. And I know that Lila feels it too. But I also know that she feels a strong connection with the other women in her life that love her so much. How lucky are we both that those women (or soon to be women) are here and present in so many ways?

Thank you girls for loving my girls. Thank you Uncle Brant and Aunt Elizabeth for raising such good examples. And thank you for giving me a day to be on top of things for once. Even if it meant realizing that I am not the end all and be all for my first baby every second of every day. It's a scary place to be but a good one.

Oh, and Aunt Elizabeth I am REALLY sorry that I took zero pictures. I'm kicking myself about it as we speak.

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