Blessed

When you have a daughter you cannot ignore the intense need to make sure she is surrounded by women who exhibit qualities that will be so hard to find in the "role models" she may see throughout her life. As I sat this weekend and watched a handful of the women I rely on to be that for my daughter, I couldn't help but smile (repeatedly). I am so proud of myself. I mean, I couldn't have picked a better crew if I had held auditions or done interviews. Their skills and knowledge alone will show her that she can be or do whatever she puts her mind to. They are brilliant, wildly hysterical, and gorgeous women that I admire and love with all of my heart. 

I'm not trying to toot my own horn here, but I have acquired quite a few best girl friends. Every month we have a girls dinner. We go on girls weekends. We check up on each other and there is never a shortage of helping hands. When Lila was born girls dinner was at my house. My freezer was filled with meals and my perfect little baby got to meet some of the most important women in my life. When Katie's baby Carson was born we did the same thing. I know there are many babies to come and I simply can't wait to return the favor.

To all of you ladies in my life, I have a challenge for you...any time you have something negative to say about yourself or you start to feel like you just aren't good enough at something, think about what you would tell Lila if she was in your shoes. You would no doubt tell her how perfect she is and that there is no reason for her to think any less because it just isn't true. Shouldn't that apply for you as well? Believe me, I will be taking my own advice.

Thank you for another great weekend girls. I pray every day that when Lila is 30 she is even half as lucky as I am to be blessed with friends like you.

All over the place

I need to take back my plan from the previous post. It is not your responsibility to hold me accountable for my own eating habits. Plus, it just didn't work. I still ate like CRAP yesterday. I am going out of town this weekend as well so I can't imagine Weight Watchers will be at the forefront of my mind. I truly have nothing to say for myself.

On a lighter note, a blog I have been reading called Marlie and Mommy (see the link and the button) featured me today! I was so flattered! She asked such great questions. I also love the way she writes about her daughter. I feel like we have a lot in common.

I realized today that I haven't actually talked about Lila in a while (other than her being sick). It seems I have been talking about myself entirely too much. Here's what's up in the world of Lila these days:

1. There seems to be either a lack of the desire or a complete defiance in regards to crawling. She can contort herself into a variety of positions that look like they could lead to crawling and then she looks at you and goes right back to sitting. You could put every toy we own just out of her reach and she would just sit there and smile at you. Yes, we did that.

2. Lila's perfect world of everything revolving around her is about to come to an abrupt halt. No, we aren't having a baby. But, my sister will begin watching Lila AND Carson starting Thursday of next week. Carson is an adorable three month old that belongs to my friends Katie and Brandon. Katie is also a teacher and she is going back to work part time for the rest of the school year. Katie has been bringing Carson over lately and when Sara holds Carson Lila becomes a little distraught. I mean, we couldn't really expect much less. Seth and I both smother her because we don't feel like we see her enough and Sara is like her very best friend in the entire world. She is never around other babies/kids so it stands to reason that confusion would set in over the new addition to her day. This would be the one and only drawback I can come up with for not doing daycare. Thank goodness Carson can teach Lila some social skills.

3. Lastly, this one's about me. Yea, I somehow made a post about Lila turn into something about me again. In my defense, it's about how I feel about her. I look at her every day and I feel like I don't really know what it's like to be a parent. I know I'm biased, but she is so unbelievably easy. She is happy, bubbly, and just plain perfect. People tried to tell me before she came that I would never know how happy a child could make me until I had one. Now I know. It scares me sometimes (well, a lot of the time). That intense kind of love is all consuming and overwhelming but I think I can handle it.

I have taken a flying leap off the Weight Watchers wagon.

I am so disappointed. Where did I go wrong? Things were going SO well. I had lost four pounds, I was in a groove, and I felt so much more in control. Unfortunately, here I sit eating chocolate and beating myself up. I mean, how do I avoid the constant stream of cupcakes and cookies from a parent for WEEKS and then all of a sudden eat everything that comes across my desk? It's like I've erased all of that hard work in a matter of days.

Honestly, I know where I went wrong. I had a birthday. I drank and ate and lived it up because it was my birthday. Wait, my birthday was TWO WEEKS AGO. I am seriously delusional. Yes, there was a party just a few days ago. Yes, I told myself after that I was back on the wagon. The party was on Saturday. It is now Tuesday and I am eating chocolate like I may never see it again. HELP.

Here is what I have decided. Every time I make a post to this blog my total points for the previous day will have to be stated in bold in the title of the post. I am saying the previous day because we all know that I would put the points up until writing that post and then go crazy afterward and no one would know. That way I will know that you all know that I am being held accountable in some weird way. I can't do meetings. I know, I know. Some would say that's the only way it works. I have done weight watchers before with no meetings and lost weight like a rock star. I know I can do it...

SO, I am allowed 23 points every day. I am going to need you to harrass me with comments if you see a number posted that is any higher than that. This is all riding on you and your ability to support me....no pressure though.

Yep, I'm 30 - Part Two

I had a feeling something else was coming for my birthday. So I did what any pain in the ass wife would do and I began asking too many questions.  I began tabulating the possibilities in my head. I mean, you only turn 30 once right? I couldn’t imagine such a day passing without some type of celebration (not planned by me). As my birthday came and went I got a little agitated. Maybe I was feeling too entitled. I know I was feeling disappointed. I harassed my sister at length.  She’s a fantastic actress. I bugged my good friend Kim who also put on quite a show. So here’s how things went down.

As last week progressed and I became more and more concerned that there was no such celebration, I decided I needed a night out anyway. I asked Kim if we could go out in Atlanta like we used to do and just spend the night at her place afterward. She thought that was a great idea and she even invited our other friend Meg (who happened to turn 30 on Wednesday). So it was set. Kim asks me later in the week if we can go to some party that her coworker was having so that she could meet a guy that is friends with the husband of the coworker. Of course, I was all for it! Meg was a little harder to convince. She thought maybe there was something planned for her birthday and she wanted to talk to her husband, Skip, to see if anything was going on. When Skip made it clear that he had stuff going on over the weekend and she could do whatever she wanted, Meg agreed to go. I could tell she was agitated too though.

Meg comes to get me to head to Kim’s. The plan was to go out to dinner before going to the “coworker’s party”. When Meg and I are in the car we discuss at length why there couldn’t possibly be a party. My mom was going “on a date”. My sister “went to Augusta to see her boyfriend”. Meg’s parents live in Texas and “couldn’t come to Atlanta this weekend”. But all along we were both thinking what if? Could something still be going on? So we get to Kim’s and she is drinking wine and acting kind of panicky. She goes on about how nervous she is to meet this guy. She even tells us his name. So we go to dinner and while Kim is away from the table Meg and I agree there is no party because Kim is all out of sorts about meeting this guy. We get in the car and head to the “coworker’s party” at some bar in Midtown.

Well, as I’m sure you’ve figured out there was no guy.  There was a party though! Seth and Skip had rented out the top floor of Engine 11. We had an amazing time. Our friends and family were all there and our husbands just really outdid themselves. Good job honey.

Meg made the tragic mistake of drinking liquor all night and (sorry Meg) that ended up being the most entertaining part of it all. (I wasn’t exactly sober either)....

The boys also got two rooms at the Georgian Terrace. I mean am I the luckiest chick or what? 

Lastly, there's no better way to end your 30th birthday than by watching one of your best friends end her 30th birthday barfing in the middle of the nicest neighborhood in Atlanta the morning after such an amazing surprise party.  Bravo Meg. What you can't see from the picture are the million dollar homes in the background. You also can't see the people walking their dogs as we let her out to puke. I can only hope my "dirty thirties", as the evite said, are nearly as much fun as my twenties have been.

What a week

There are no complaints here, but I have to say this week has been a doozy.  There are no complaints because I feel more aware right now than ever just how good I have it. The stories and events coming out of Haiti are heartbreaking to say the least. I only hope the immense amount of aid and all of the donations are utilized as effectively and swiftly as possible.

In my teeny tiny part of the universe this has been a doozy of a week for various reasons. Lila has been very sick and it's leaving a mark all over my face apparently. Certain people at work keep asking me if I'm alright. Some have even made sure to tell me I look exhausted. Seriously, who really thinks it's ok to let something like that come out of their mouth? If I saw you and you looked tired the LAST thing I would say is "Oh my goodness! You look SO tired!". Real Simple daily thought:

"Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness you have good manners, no matter which fork you use."  - Emily Post
LOVE THAT

Anyway, Lila has slept through the night since month two. She has always been an amazing sleeper so we have been incredibly spoiled to say the least. About two weeks before she got sick she started randomly waking up in the middle of the night and we were actually hoping it was due to teething (she has zero teeth so far). She would wake up for 5 or 10 minutes but once we would go in and soothe her a little she would go back to sleep. Then she got sick and now sleeping has been difficult for everyone. Last night I actually laid in my bed with her next to me propped up on a pillow and watched her cough for an hour. She would drift to sleep and then cough like crazy. She (and I) finally fell asleep and Seth came in and put her in the bed. When he took her from our bed to her bed I remember crossing my fingers in my half sleep that she would just make the peaceful transition without a peep. We got lucky that time.

It hasn't helped that we are having our den "renovated". Nap time has been non-existent because Sara puts her to sleep and she is woken minutes later by drilling. But, she went to the doctor today and was given antibiotics so hopefully the end is near. They said they were shocked she hadn't really gotten sick until now. Again there's that nagging feeling that this is my fault because I stopped breast feeding. Does that ever go away? It's like a little cloud that follows me around. Needless to say, she was going to get sick at some point.

I also want to mention that tonight marked the first time I have allowed myself to put a 12 month outfit on her (pajamas actually). I put them on because they are so freaking cute, but also because I just wanted to see if they fit. To my horror they fit perfectly. She is only 8 and a half months old!  This can't be happening. I don't care how physically big she is but mentally this is messing with me.  This throws it in my face that she is closer to being a one year old than I am ready for her to be. I got over it (not really, but a little) once I saw how insanely cute the pajamas were. Well, due to the disarray of my house I couldn't seem to get a great picture. I can't find the battery charger to my regular digital camera, I have NO CLUE yet how to work the new fancy digital camera, and my phone takes crappy pictures. However, I got what I could get on the phone. She doesn't look sick at all! Plus, when she's on the changing table she refuses to put her legs down.  She is obsessed with her feet.  Therefore, you can't even see the pajamas, but I tried.

Too much thinking going on

Being an overthinker has always been a major flaw in my overall makeup. Before marriage and baby my overthinking was entirely about me. What was I going to be when I grew up? Did my butt look big? Did so and so notice me? When I met Seth my overthinking was all about him. Does he think my butt looks big? Does he notice how much I don't call him in hopes that he will call me? Does he love me enough to marry me? Now there is the overthinking of motherhood that pretty much takes the cake on ANY other thinking about anything I might have done in my entire life. In one day here are my questions:

How do I know how sick she is if she is smiling through the snot and cough?
At what point do you call the pediatrician, or worse, choose the "this is an emergency" option on the automated service?
Is she getting sick because I stopped breast feeding? Is it really building her immune system to get sick or do people just tell you that to make you feel better?
When is she going to get teeth? I mean, could she really be a toothless wonder for much longer?
Why isn't she crawling? Is it because she just isn't interested? Is it because we don't put her on her tummy enough? Or is she just not ready?
Does it make her anywhere near as happy as it makes me when she looks me straight in the face and gets closer and closer to my face until our noses touch and we both laugh?
How will I ever be able to express to her just what she means to me?

There are no books that have answers to these questions. Yes, there are books. There are countless books that claim to know it all and teach it all. BUT, there is nothing that gives me the answers when I need them in the way that I need them. I just have to suck it up, wait until the overthinking subsides, and deal with whatever I can at that moment. It's a good thing she's so darn cute because that totally helps.

Tag, I'm it!

My new friend over at Marlie and Me tagged me!  The rules of the tag are that I am supposed to describe seven things about myself that you don't already know (well, that most of you don't already know).  After that I have to tag seven others to do the same. Here goes:

1. I have recently become totally addicted to the cinnamon dolce latte at Starbucks.  I have spent my entire life disliking coffee. I guess I just finally found the coffee for me.

2. I watch the trashiest of reality shows if they are on and then I make fun of them and people who watch them. I can't help it.

3. I wish that I could run. I mean really run. It's something I have always wanted to be good at and I even have dreams that I am a fantastic runner. I tried to be in real life, but it just didn't work out.

4. I secretly feel like I should be using cloth diapers. There is something holding me back. No matter how green I try to become I can't do it. Not yet anyway.

5. I want to be a stay at home mom with five children. How do I make that happen? Oh wait, I know. Win the lottery.

6. My biggest pet peeve is mouth noises. I know I have mentioned that, but I don't think I have ever shared how truly aggravating they are for me. Hearing someone eat makes my skin crawl.

7. The first concert I ever attended was The Judds at Six Flags in Atlanta when I was in middle school. THAT, my friends, is when I became a sophisticated redneck.

Alright ladies.  Tag, you're it!

Party of Five
The Redhead Riter
From My Kitchen to Yours
Bean Blog
Ah...Me So Hongry!
Blue Cotton Memory
Maneuvering Motherhood

Yep, I'm 30

I would love to say I am out dancing and partying.  Today is the first day of the next decade of my life. But I am actually sitting on my couch drinking wine and watching Shark Tank with my half asleep husband on a Friday night (that also happens to be my 30th birthday). That's probably neither here nor there though.

Seth got me an incredibly fancy, brand new, very advanced, camera. So if you thought I already had too many pictures of my child on my blog, you just wait. My mom got me a Flip video camera. So not only should you be prepared for an insane amount of photos, but you should also be prepared for video montages starring LJ. I just won't be able to help myself.

I had this really great blog written up about turning 30. I type a lot of my blogs in gmail right now because I don't totally know how to work the Mac word processing program yet.  Well, because of gmail's biggest flaw I deleted it.  I mean, who puts the "save" button next to the "discard" button?  That mystifies me.

For documentation purposes, here is how my twenties went:

I began my twenties living in the best city in the country. While at the University of Georgia I learned how to have a good time, how to be myself, and how to deal with life.  I lost a great friend, saw the end of my family as I knew it, and solidified the best group of friends on the planet.  Those friends still feel as much a part of my family now as they did then. For that I am incredibly grateful.

Then I went to Europe with Meg. That would be when the girl who feels small town went to the big cities. There are no words to describe how Europe changed me. There are no words that I could use to express just how important and influential that trip and those people were on me. Someday I will get around to writing about it and do it justice.

After that I moved to Atlanta with Kim.  We went from Vinings to the Highlands and all along the way had a blast. We worked a lot and partied a lot and tried to pretend like we weren't getting older. I am pretty sure we worked on behaving the same way then that we did in college. I am also pretty sure we succeeded. Somewhere in there I met my dear husband. Kim did the best job of putting up with his uncertainty. She has also done the best job of backing him up when he came crawling back (sorry honey). I mean, she did what any best friend would do.  I just hope she knows I would do the same for her.

So Seth and I got married and spent a great deal of our mid to late twenties watching others get married. We were rock stars at weddings and we sang a mean Piano Man on many dance floors. Then, one day, we decided it was time to begin to leave our mark on the world. That is where we are now.  We are learning, loving, and embracing parenthood day by day.

That is my twenties in a nutshell.  I will miss them terribly.  BUT, I am consoled by the fact that I am way too cool to feel "old" in my thirties. I just don't. I feel young, refreshed, and ready to take on the world one baby at a time ;-)

"Happiness often sneaks in through a door you didn't know you left open." - John Barrymore, Real Simple quote of the day

Have you ever felt like you are shedding some of the person you used to be?  At first I thought this feeling I was having was due to resolutions for the new year or the fact that I'm entering a new decade in my life.  But really, I think happiness just snuck in.  I know.  CHEESY.  However, it's the God's honest truth.  I have always considered myself to be a happy person, albeit tragically pessimistic. I have typically had a very low tolerance for quite a lot of things. Bad drivers, mouth noises, unexpected change, and being late are just a few occurrences that could throw me for a major loop and turn me into a crazy person. Ok, the mouth noises are still getting to me, but I am feeling a calm about myself that I haven't experienced in quite a long time. 

Now follow me as I really jump on the mushy, cheesy train. I have this sneaking suspicion that two things are the cause of the new me. Isn't it obvious? She's plastered all over this blog. I have always known I was meant to be a mother and it truly is the first thing I feel good at. I was hoping to feel that way as I'm sure all mothers do.  But, it's more than that. Lila as a person seems to make everything better. I think to myself in certain situations that normally I would be getting to that place where the craziness is going to come out. But recently it just doesn't. I even find myself waiting for it. I don't know if I just don't have time to dwell on the CRAP anymore or if she has changed me that much. 

Next we have my husband. He's different too, and I'm not sure he knows it. He is what you would call a work-aholic. He does know that. The difference is the partnership of parenting has inadvertently brought out more of what I have needed in him. He does the dishes more (or the most I should say). He notices more things that need to be done. I'm not saying he was a slacker before, but let's be honest. I believe that the woman typically just does more at home. It is what it is. That is changing in my house and I LOVE IT. Add in things like him asking my mom to get us three date nights for Christmas and it's love at 8 millionth sight. I'm just sayin.

Now, this could all be in my imagination and Seth may tell me I have lost my mind later. And that's fine if that is the case. He knows my crazy side more than anyone. I just hope that at least in my own head she stays locked up somewhere only to come out when absolutely necessary. Until then, thank you to my perfect little family for bringing me into 2010 and my thirties with a smile.

Rock Star? Movie Star? Hand Model?

My sister took some random pictures of Lila last week.  She put these little purple sunglasses on her and, well, this is the result. She seemed to struggle a little with the fact that things looked different.  Of course, it looks like she got over it eventually and hammed it up. I have a boatload of other pictures to share that my friend Sarah took, but they are all so good I am struggling with how to share them.  Stay tuned...

Wants versus needs

Have you ever come across something to purchase that could get something done for you ten times easier and faster but you don't actually NEED it? You have a perfectly fine way of doing it with what you have, but this pricy wonder item is almost haunting you. For instance, I think I may or may not have registered for the $300 mixer as a wedding gift. Either way, I did not get one. I like to bake, but I have always felt that I am getting by just fine with my hand mixer. Yea it would be fabulous to have the mixer, but not necessary. And I don't have $300 just sitting around to buy something I will use infrequently. 

Ok well, I am struggling with another similar appliance. I am one of the crazy mommies that makes her own baby food. I am not saying I have never used a jar of baby food.  I'm just saying I prefer to make my own.  I'm not going to get on a soapbox about it, but we are trying as a whole to eat more organically. What is more organic than just whipping it up yourself? That being said, it is a little time consuming the way I am currently doing it.  I go to the farmer's market, buy the food, and I come home and prepare it in whatever fashion I am supposed to for that food.  If it needs to be pureed (meaning I can't just mash it up) I put it in my magic bullet. That may seem like a stupid idea because a blender/food processor is so much bigger. BUT, I have not met a blender/food processor that actually processed enough to be pureed. In fact, any one I have ever owned was CRAP. The magic bullet is everything it claims to be in the incredibly annoying infomercial. So I have just continually used that.  

Seth and I went out to dinner Friday night to our favorite local restaraunt and we have become friends with one of the waiters.  He and his wife recently had a baby and we were talking about making baby food.  He asked if we made our own and I said yes. He asked how I did it and I told him about the magic bullet. He then casually mentioned some appliance they got from Williams Sonoma that "does it all" he said. I wasn't entirely sure what that meant until now.  I am astonished (and I'm sure this item is common knowledge to some people, but it wasn't to me). The thing really does EVERYTHING.

• A steamer, blender, warmer and defroster in one compact appliance.
• Steams vegetables, fruits, meat and fish in less than 15 minutes, preserving vitamins and flavors.
• Purees or blends foods to the desired consistency.
• Quickly reheats or defrosts precooked foods.
• The machine has no traceable amounts of BPA.
• Recipes included.

Now I am unsure of how to proceed.  Seth says we don't need it.  But Seth (I love you honey), does not make the baby food. The way I am doing it is working just fine.  I don't NEED it per say.  It would just really be convenient to have it. What's sad is I have a birthday coming up and this is something I am considering asking for. I could ask for a massage or night out on the town.  Nope. I want the all in one baby food maker.  Rock on with my bad self.

Best thing I ever ate....

Seth and I are addicted to The Food Network.  Again, as with our dog on a diet, it would stand to reason that if we love to eat we would love an entire network devoted to eating.  So they have this show named something similar to the title of this post.  We are watching Ace of Cakes as we speak and a commercial for the show comes on.  Seth asks me what the best thing I ever ate was and I am floored by the fact that I cannot seem to come up with what it is.  Since I do much of my eating with him I told him to tell me what his was so that maybe it would trigger mine.  He goes into a dissertation on some tempura we had at Bluepoint on our anniversary one year.  I remember the entire meal quite well.  The tempura however did not leave enough of a mark on my palate to title it the best thing I ever ate.

Now here I sit racking my brain over this when I should be going to bed (even though part of me wants to stay up late(er) due to the possible snow day I am PRAYING will happen tomorrow). I have a major love affair with seafood so I am trying to think along those lines.  But, I can throw back meat and potatoes pretty well too. I am just shocked I can't think of even a possible contender.

Since I can't seem to let this go, I am asking if you read this blog that you comment with the best thing you ever ate.  Maybe your ideas will clue me in.

Um, and just to really call myself out in the eating department, Seth and I are attempting to do Weight Watchers together.  I recently found a blog called "Ah...Me So Hongry! Misadventures of a Weight Watchers Repeat Offender". THAT IS ME.  She is so funny by the way.  You should totally check it out (see mommy blogs to the right).  At any rate, we have been going strong since Monday.  I am so proud of us.  And I'm starving.  You can't win 'em all though.

She's famous!!!

Ok not really, but Lila's derriere does have a cameo in the latest "how to diaper your baby" video on Webmd.  About a month ago we participated in a shoot for these new parenting videos on Webmd.  It was really fun and she did such a good job.  Anyway, her portion was supposed to show that you need to give your baby "naked time" during the day to prevent diaper rash.  Apparently I didn't follow the advice very well because we just finished battling the diaper rash from you know where.  Lesson learned!  What's so hysterical to me about the video is that you will probably have no idea when she's on unless I spell it out for you.  I mean, truly all you see is her backside.  It's so cute though!  The video is kind of long and her 5 seconds (or less) is right in the middle somewhere.  I believe it's right after the one minute mark where the doctor says something about poo being the color of mustard.  She's laying on a huge multi-colored mat and she's quite obviously the oldest/biggest kid in the show.  Way to go LJ!  You rocked that pseudo infomercial ;-)

http://www.webmd.com/parenting/baby/diapering-a-baby-9/default.htm

Just not ready

Back to work today I went.  I feel like complaining about having to go back to work after a two week break is really bratty of me.  I mean, most people would love to have a job where such breaks were just par for the course.  But then I have to ask, why aren't most people teachers if that's the case?  Hence, I do not feel bad complaining anymore.

It was miserable.  Lila woke up two hours early because she heard me get up.  She broke my heart with her separation anxiety and little footy pajamas.  I started Weight Watchers today so my now "skinny" cinnamon dolce latte was not as thrilling as I needed it to be.  And the complaints just fall out from there.  I know. Woe is me. To make matters worse, Lila's nap schedule changed over the break. Now instead of getting up right around when I usually get home she is going down for a nap at that time. SO, here I sit anxiously waiting for her to wake up so I can spend time with her.  Soon I am off to dinner with my friend Kim that I miss terribly.  She didn't go anywhere.  We just don't see each other enough anymore. So, I have decided dinner with Kim will save this wretched day.  It does mean only seeing Lila for a few minutes, but she needs some daddy time and I need to see my best friend.

All of my complaining aside, it was sort of (only sort of) nice to get up, get ready, and make myself presentable before noon.

Holy Mommyland

Alright, so in the past week I have figured out what stay at home moms do besides, well, everything.  When they aren't doing everything they are blogging.  Seriously, I thought I had an idea, but I had NO IDEA.  I met a blogger named the redhead riter.  She helped me revamp my blog.  In the process I am meeting other mommy bloggers.  I am now convinced it is safe to say that 98% of mothers are also writers/bloggers.  Are they great writers?  That's for you to judge.  What's so astonishing is the sheer number of them.  I mean, I guess you could say the population of bloggers has many vast categories at this point in time.  And you could probably say that each category is teeming with writers and blogs now that blogging is so mainstream.  I think it's great that blogging has given rise to so many voices.  I just find it so interesting for some reason.  I blog on a completely selfish level.  I want to write.  I want to write even if no one ever reads or cares.  I do it for myself (and my friends and family) and if others read and get enjoyment out of it then I am pleasantly surprised. The world of the mommy blogger has become so fascinating to me mostly because each blog is just one in a sea of millions. What a great resource too right?  If you are a mom with your own personal situation and you are seeking advice I guarantee you there is a blog out there written by someone in your EXACT position.  With the exception of maybe octomom, no mommy can truly say no one has been in her shoes or knows how she feels.  Guess what?  Someone does.  Just Google it.

What if...

The last time we took Molly to the vet they told us that she was five to ten pounds overweight.  Their instructions were to feed her a quarter less food every day. Apparently we were overfeeding our dog.  I mean, we overfeed ourselves so it would stand to reason that we do the same to our pet whether we realized it or not. So when we came home I promptly began decreasing her food.  Low and behold she dropped what I'm assuming is five pounds or so in what seemed like a week.

Can you imagine?  What if?  What if there was just some magical being somewhere that automatically reduced your food intake because you were a little overweight and then the "problem" was solved in a matter of days?  I found myself envying my dog.  I mean, don't get me wrong.  She walks around this house like she might eat a paper clip if it fell on the floor.  I dropped a very small piece of lettuce today and she devoured it like it was the biggest doggie biscuit made at Petsmart.  While I envy the fact that her weight loss is so manageable and matter of fact, I do not envy the longing desire to eat that has now taken over her mind.

At the end of the day would I take her weight loss program over mine?  Well, since mine is non-existent and hers has a 100% success rate, HELL YES I WOULD.