Your candy coated bloated ego, platinum pile of....

Seth and Jana's conversations as they watch the VMAs:(Seth entered about thirty minutes into the show)

(J) I know you hate awards shows, but you will like this one because of who's hosting....although I think she may be high...
(S) Chelsea Handler?
(J) How'd you know?

(J) This performance is the stupidest thing I have ever seen
(J) At least we know Justin Bieber can play an instrument
(S) That's what I was going to say!

(J) I want to punch Kesha in the face

(J) I actually REALLY love this song
(S) YES...this is MY theme song
(song being I Wanna Be a Billionaire)

(S) Are they really relevant enough to be on this show? (referencing the cast of Glee)
(J) (blank stare)

(J) Seriously, if eight people have to help you get to the stage every time...
(S) That's not even what she wore there!
(J) ...it's just too much effort.
(S) God, she's such an idiot (that would be Lady Gaga)

(J) I like Drake
(J) I also really like Justin Timberlake
(S) (blank stare)
(S) Is that white guy Drake? Is that guy even white?
(J) (hysterically laughing)
(J) No that's Drake
(S) Who's the white guy?
(J) The piano player
(S) No they said his name was Swiss Cheese
(J) (hysterically laughing again)
(S) (rewinding to where JT introduces Drake and crew) SEE, they said his name is Swiss Beats...I was close

(S) Is it really necessary for these people to change their clothes eighteen times?
(J) Apparently

(J) SWIZZ BEATZ...that's his name...they just put it up on the screen with Jay-Z
(S) (throwing hands up) sorry!

(J) I am totally digging these H&M commercials

(S) Mickey Mouse did a lot of drugs...his head is all lit up...he must have done a lot of E...get it? His name is MickEEEE mouse?
(J) ?

Alright, I think I'm going to stop. If you didn't watch the VMAs or you just find this mindless babble to be stupid (because it is) I apologize. I love awards shows no matter how ridiculous. But now I have a headache which may turn into a seizure from Usher's light show of a performance a while ago. I can't be sure.

PS - Sara won the present for the last lyric post title. Bravo Sara! Present coming soon...