So glad I asked

I know when I ask for suggestions or opinions here I am opening myself up for many diverse options to choose from. When I say many I mean five or so. But still, for a girl like me five is a lot to consider. When I asked for help in regards to shopping organically I got many really wonderful suggestions. I thank you for that. The stand out suggestion was given by my good friend Josie. It was then reiterated via Facebook chat by another friend named Laura.

What was the suggestion? Nature's Garden Delivered. What sold me? DELIVERED. No really. I'm so serious. That, and it's all organic. But really, if you tell me you walk and talk like a CSA yet you walk yourself to my door we are an instant match made in heaven.

Beyond the delivery selling point you may be wondering what else makes it so fantastic. I will tell you.

1) Your typical CSA provides you with a big old box of locally grown goodness. The downfall is that you get what you get (and you have to go get it!). So, if you don't particularly like eggplant and you get two of them what on Earth do you do with it? With NGD you set your preferences. If you don't eat eggplant you tell them you never want it. Done and done. Plus, if you got too many apples and didn't finish them last week you can exchange this week's apples for something else. You get three exchanges per week.

2) There is no major commitment. You sign up for weekly or every other week and then cancel if you don't like it. If you pick the large box and realize your eyes were bigger than your belly you can pick the small one next time. Flexibility is key.

3) Add ons. NGD offers a range of items in addition to the fruits and veggies boxes. They have eggs, milk (not fully pasteurized), bread, some meats, spices, etc. I have gotten random meats, eggs, bread, and milk. All of it has been fantastic. I will not reorder the milk simply because it's not fully pasteurized. But, the bread is so yummy. The eggs are better than any organic store bought I have had. The meat has been amazing too, but is very expensive.

4) Recipe education. I know that I love bok choy, but I don't buy it too often and have little knowledge of how to cook with it. While at the beach for my friend Kim's wedding I had to approve my box on my phone. If I'm being honest, I had relaxed nicely with a few beverages and maybe wasn't totally paying attention. We ended up with two gigantic things of bok choy and 8 onions. I quickly checked Pinterest and made this salad out of the bok choy, apples, and carrots that all came in our box.

AMAZING. So now I try to be open to things and try new recipes. In fact, in an effort not to waste anything from the box I buy less from the store. I was already shopping on the "outside" aisles of the grocery store and not buying anything from a box (except cereal). But now I strictly buy things like milk, yogurt, meat, cereal, and Lila specific foods at the store. This literally takes me all of ten minutes. BRILLIANT!

Those are the obvious advantages. The not so obvious looks like this...





Since this first box, getting our box on Tuesdays has become a bit of a ritual for us. Lila gets so excited to open the box and take out all of the items. I do eggs, bread, and granola every other week. I have bought grass fed ground beef multiple times now, but the other meats are just too expensive. They don't do chicken yet so I'm anxiously awaiting that. They recently started Almond butter which we will get once our peanut butter runs out.

Here's what you are thinking. Jana is going to be so skinny and so healthy within minutes because all she eats are fruits and vegetables. I wish that were true for me and for the rest of our family. Lila is the pickiest eater. She eats a lot of the fruit but she has a short list of other foods she will eat. I try not to make a big deal out of it. I figure we can cater to that within reason while offering her the good stuff. I'm hoping the box opening ritual helps too. I also feel like if she lives off of fruit, milk, yogurt, sweet potatoes, carrots, bread/granola, and salami (random I know) then she's doing ok.

The problem comes when we leave the house. I eat on the go a lot due to my super glamorous second job. We eat out a lot socially on the weekends. When we eat out we do not try to eat well at all. Now that I feel like what's in my house is under control my next goal is to make the eating out fit this mold as well. We shall see.

There you have my full review of NGD. LOVE IT. Big ups to Josie.

Now if I can just figure out how to get all non-food items from Amazon at the best possible price I will be one happy camper.

**SIDE NOTE**
While it may seem that I am incredibly lazy in my quest for all things delivered, I feel I should stand up for myself. I am a SAHM. If I'm going to cart my little chickies somewhere I would just rather it be the playground over the grocery store. Evie is at the "I hate all things that buckle me in" stage. While little embarrasses me these days, the horror movie scream just flat out gives me a headache. Why not choose the best of both worlds and have organic, amazing food brought to my door? Who am I kidding? I wish everything delivered. I actually wish a stylist would show up at my house once a month with racks of clothing in my size and taste and then just make me look good. Is this what happens for rich people? Call it lazy. I call it making the most of my time.

Easter

It would seem that if you aren't hosting a holiday it should be a breeze right? I guess when you have two Easter egg hunts, three places to be within 48 hours, and two children the word breeze doesn't come to mind. But, we had a blast. A big thank you needs to be said to those that did host us. I said a little thankful prayer for you people all weekend as I didn't have to have a clean house or food on the table. Praise the Lord. Evie slept through both hunts which is why you don't see her a ton in the pictures. There are some randoms of the past few days thrown in simply because I have actually decided to use my big fancy camera.  Enjoy!

Let's start with an impromptu photo shoot with Evie. Doesn't she look thrilled? 

So yea, this is how it ended. This would be a visual of the scream, string of snot and all.

Egg dyeing... I've decided it's such a weird thing to do. I mean, Lila liked it. I guess that's what matters.

Random botanical gardens picture.

*Easter morning*

Um, what exactly is the point of this gigantic bunny again?

Look closely at the puzzle. Yea, it's 101 pieces. It was bought in the dollar aisle at Target. It has since mysteriously disappeared and the Easter bunny has decided it does help to pay much closer attention no matter how distracted while shopping.

Egg hunt round #1.

Evie's post nap appearance with Grammy. I promise her hair does that on it's own. 

Egg hunt round #2. I just love these pictures of her.

I hate profile shots of myself, but this profile of her reminds me of pictures of me as a kid so much. This is my favorite picture from the entire weekend.

Here's what's happening: Patrick and Madelyn can't figure out why we are still waiting to take the picture. Carson is talking up a storm about something. Lila is having a very hard time staying on the slim piece of wood that they are all standing on therefore delaying the taking of the picture!

While the light was amazing at Seth's mom's house on Easter, I am sure the pictures I took could have been a million times better. I had the best time taking them though. She was looking out the window at the cat and following him from the door to the window. I could just smooch that little face all day long.

The pictures start to get a little out of order here, but Blogger is a pain in the rear so this is how they shall stay. This one was taken today. Lila got a big kick out of the flower crown and necklace I made for her. Anyone else make these as a kid? I just adore this picture too.

See! Wrong spot...weird but beautiful picture.

This was today too. We are entering the land of more and more attempts at playing with each other. They had the best time!

This is just hysterical to me and a great way to end the photos. The slide gave them matching hairdos. 

Have a good weekend ya'll!

A little inspiration

My children, music, and great writing are three things that inspire me on a daily basis. I would like to share a little bit of those inspirations with you! As you will see, some are intertwined. For instance, Lila's "songwriting" incorporates all three nicely...



Good music...like the stuff that gets under your skin in the best possible way and won't go away...is hard to find these days. It seems it's everywhere and nowhere at the same time. The brilliance of Mumford and Sons and The Civil Wars gets mere minutes at the VMA's or the Grammy's, if that. Even further still there are so many amazing artists under the surface that you don't hear on the radio and you really have to seek out. In the music tab above I finally posted new videos. Ironically, Gotye is all over the place. This video is mesmerizing to me. I watched it ten times in a row because that's what I do. I have used nap time to just dig and dig and dig for the good stuff because the Princess CD that is on repeat in my house and car, while beautiful, isn't really cutting it. Mommy is about to lie to her daughter and say we can't find the Princess CD today so that I can break out some good old fashioned brilliant music.

If you are wondering where I have been looking for the good stuff, there are a few spots. I found this little blog forever ago and then totally forgot about it. Again, that's what I do. I rediscovered not only her amazing idea and writing today, but her taste in music that often mirrors mine. I know it's not for everyone. If you aren't into the music you should at least check out her blog. She's pretty inspiring.

Then there's Black Cab Sessions. If you love live music this is quite the stroke of genius. Unfortunately, their USA cab sessions aren't viewable anywhere yet by actual Americans. At least not anywhere that I can find. They filmed in Athens, GA though which should let you know that they know what they're doing.

As far as writing goes, I have come across a few new mommy affirming reads that I think I was meant to find this week. Every day a good mommy should say to herself, "I am not supermom, nor should I try to be". If you need a little nudge that you are a rockstar mom, take a look...

The first is from this blog that I had never read before. Most good posts I find are through someone else on Facebook. This one made me laugh a little. I love me some Pinterest, but I have fallen victim to feeling not enough because of stupid things that don't get done and don't need to. Remember that lampshade I was going to make for Evie's room? After THREE attempts I trashed it and bought one on Ebay. It was incredibly liberating. Personal life lesson number 9, 347...stop believing that because you are creative you have to make everything.

The second was also posted on Facebook the other day. Thanks Lindi!

The Scary Mommy Manifesto

I shall maintain a sense of humor about all things motherhood, for without it, I recognize that I may end up institutionalized. Or, at the very least, completely miserable.

I shall not judge the mother in the grocery store who, upon entering, hits the candy aisle and doles out M&M’s to her screaming toddler. It is simply a survival mechanism.

I shall not compete with the mother who effortlessly bakes from scratch, purees her own baby food, or fashions breathtaking costumes from tissue paper. Motherhood is not a competition. The only ones who lose are the ones who race the fastest.

I shall shoot the parents of the screaming newborn on the airplane looks of compassion rather than resentment. I am fortunate to be able to ditch the kid upon landing. They, however, are not.

I shall never ask any woman whether she is, in fact, expecting. Ever.

I shall not question the mother who is wearing the same yoga pants, flip-flops, and T-shirt she wore to school pickup the day before. She has good reason.

I shall never claim to know everything about children other than my own (who still remain a mystery to me).

I shall hold the new babies belonging to friends and family, so they may shower and nap, which is all any new mother really wants.

I shall strive to pass down a healthy body image to my daughter. She deserves a mother who loves and respects herself; stretch marks, dimples, cellulite, and all.

I shall not preach the benefits of breast-feeding or circumcision or homeschooling or organic food or co-sleeping or crying it out to a fellow mother who has not asked my opinion. It’s none of my damn business.

I shall try my hardest to never say never, for I just may end up with a loud mouthed, bikini-clad, water gun–shooting toddler of my very own.

I shall remember that no mother is perfect and that my children will thrive because of, and sometimes even in spite of me.

From Confessions of a Scary Mommy: An Honest and Irreverent Look at Motherhood — The Good, The Bad, and The Scary by Jill Smokler.

Between her scream and her ear infections neither of us can hear

I love our pediatrician. Evie's horror movie scream started in the elevator and lasted through taking the vitals and questions asked by the nurse. I gave her a snack which provided a short lull. Evie got going again when Dr. LeDuc came in the room. Dr. LeDuc smiled and said, "I think she's going to be a fantastic singer!".

Evie's scream doesn't embarrass me or really even ruffle me anymore. It simply hurts my ears. But, I can't complain. She's the one that's on her third round of antibiotics for a double ear infection and she's not even one yet. The poor thing gets a runny nose and within hours she's got a fever over 102 and can't sleep.

Have I mentioned Evie is not a great napper? I mean, on the whole she's a very light sleeper. She sleeps through the night well, but if she does happen to wake up it can be a daunting task to get her to go back to sleep. Recently, we have tried more to let her cry it out. You can imagine how that goes. It's possible she could wake the neighbors kids with that scream and not just her sister. So, this is what happens now when she wakes up with these infections. We have found that if we take her out of the bed and out of her room for 15 to 20 minutes she goes back to bed pretty easily. What a sad little chickie :(

Evie video round up

Evie is sick. Again. I swear she just finished an antibiotic for a double ear infection not even two weeks ago. She is a straight up hot mess and we are headed to the doctor tomorrow for what I'm assuming is another ear infection. She cried pretty much from the end of her second nap until she went to bed. When I say nap I use the term loosely. Twenty to thirty minutes just isn't enough.

After the big, fat Lila post yesterday I realized there's a lot on my phone of Evie that I haven't shared yet. Sick or not, she's quite a character. She's feisty, headstrong, and pretty hysterical. Here are a random assortment of videos that have been taken in the past month or so...

If I have posted this one already I apologize. I tried to go back and look and didn't see it, but I swear I thought I posted it. Anyway, I realize that my saying "no, no, no" and her laughing is not good parenting. Unfortunately, it's freaking adorable and I can't make it stop.


Two things. Does anyone remember the "my child is weird" post about Lila? It seems Evie is trying to join the weird club where Lila and Carson are co-presidents. And, if you listen to the conversation with Lila when I ask her if Carson is the king then what does that make her she says, "um, very comfortable, always tired...". All sorts of RANDOM going on here.


Speaking of weird, I would love to know what she is thinking about this shoe. And when I say weird it most certainly is a term of endearment. I would much rather weird, entertaining children than ones that are boring.


I wish I had been able to take a video for the entire thirty minutes that Evie insisted on sliding at playdate. I was exhausted when we left and she was on cloud nine.


The walking...it's coming...what is happening!!!!!??????
This video actually shows all aspects of Evie's personality thus far. She starts off quick and excited. She begins to get frustrated because she can't turn the toy. She gets excited again, falls, starts to freak out, and begins again...sort of. Then she thinks it's funny to crawl/dance and push. Then out of nowhere she is pissed.


Reason number 842 why being the second born can be unfortunate: this would be Evie's first time, ever, on a swing. She will be one in a month. Shame, shame, shame on me.


Isn't she so cute?


IF YOU WATCH NO OTHER VIDEOS IN THIS POST YOU MUST WATCH THIS ONE!
There's just so much to say here. Seth took this Tuesday night while I was out doing my super glamorous second job. I was hating on my job and all around cranky and miserable. He emailed me this video about halfway through the night and I sat in my car laughing hysterically. I think I watched it eight times. I mean between the matching hairstyle and Evie's flood of a sneeze that she licks off during the entire thing without Seth ever noticing I didn't know if I would ever stop laughing. Priceless.


I hope you enjoyed these as much as I did!

Hello Lila, it's me Mommy!!!!

This is going to be one of those posts where I tell you a tidbit of parenting information followed by the advice I'm trying to read or put into practice. Sadly, nowhere in this post will there be an actual review of said information.

Everyone keeps telling me "just wait until she's three". Lila gave me a big, fat run for my money from about 18 months until maybe a month ago. If you regularly read this blog or talk to me even once in a blue moon, you know what I'm referring to. The terrible twos hit and when they did it was a blow to my entire psyche. Things like "do I have Jekyl and Hyde for a daughter?" or "what am I doing so wrong that is making her HATE ME?" ran through my head daily. She's brilliant. She's sweet and cuddly. She's helpful and lovely and I could go on and on. But she pretty much stomped on all my buttons daily.

Lila will be three in a little over a month. The changes I am seeing almost seem unreliable. Truly, everyone I know with children over the age of three has said something to me about the "trying threes". I'm so in love with this age and always have been. But now I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to fall. I should take my own advice and stop comparing and/or thinking she will be like all other kids. That's what I hear you saying in my head.

While the changes in her have been so refreshing, there are one or two behaviors I can't seem to figure out how to handle. She does things with almost no fight now but I have to ask her eighteen times. Sometimes I even move her in the direction of where I need her to go to get the ball rolling. I will have said it eight times and then she will so sweetly look at me and say, "mommy, what did you want me to do?". I am fully aware that this is completely normal. But, I also feel like by saying things over and over I am teaching her that she doesn't have to do something the first time I ask. Most of the time I don't feel like she's not listening on purpose. Regardless, I have been in search of ways to attempt to get her to hear me/listen the first time. In the process of looking at parenting strategies I came across a lot of negative talk about time out and how it doesn't work. The more I read the more I realized it really doesn't. I mean, it does in the moment, but the long term often doesn't pan out. I started reading more and more about Parenting with Positive Guidance. I already do some of what this philosophy entails, but I was relying pretty heavily on time out for a while. Plus, to me not listening the first time isn't really time out worthy.

Anyway, I bought an ebook from a blogger I like and I watched a webinar by Amy McCready, founder of Positive Parenting Solutions. I feel like what I've read and listened to so far have been incredibly helpful and I haven't really even scratched the surface. Just like anything else in parenting, there are a million ways to tackle a problem. There are a million choices to confuse and muddle things just a bit more than they already seem to be. I'm curious to know if anyone who reads this has any tips or solutions for the behavior known as selective hearing? In the mean time, as I get further into this stuff I will update my progress.

I would like to back up now and repeat this sentence:

LILA WILL BE THREE INA LITTLE OVER A MONTH.

What is happening???

We went to a playground yesterday that we hadn't been to in a very long time. I'm not even sure Evie was born the last time we went. This playground has all levels of play equipment. I do remember the last time we went I felt like I had to follow Lila on every single thing. Yesterday she and I both beamed at the reality that now she can do all of it by herself. SHE WAS SO PROUD. There was one section that had a ladder but it was one of those ladders that curves as it goes up. For some reason she was most proud of her ability to get to the top using this particular ladder. In this area there was another girl playing. I'm fairly certain she thought Lila was much older than she is. When Lila told the little girl she was about to be three it was clear she was more than shocked. And even though she was five and acting all shocked, she really wanted Lila to play with her. Again, Lila was so proud. Every time she went up the ladder she would say, to herself, "I am such a big girl". And every time she did this it took everything I had not to start crying.

I have a horrible memory. The older she gets the harder and harder it is for me to clearly remember her as a baby. Sometimes I watch videos, but that can be kind of heartbreaking too. And I'm always trying to live in the moment with Evie and her baby days at the same time. Thank God for technology. There is no true way to bottle up these days, but at least I have videos.

Speaking of technology, look at my precious girl...

Not only was she Sara's doctor today, but she gave her the full salon experience complete with hair drying, curling iron, and brush. And she never even batted an eye. Sara commented that this was some serious pretending. This is why I believe giving children access to technology is a good thing. But, that's another post for another day ;-)

Happy hump day ya'll!

Judging

People look at other people every day, sometimes all day, and snap judgements are made at a maddening rate. If you believe that you go through your day without judging others based on simple appearances stop reading (and, for the record, I don't believe you).  I'm not saying all of these judgments are negative. Many are probably quite positive. They just happen. I'm not judging you for doing it either. In fact, I'm trying to embrace it...to some degree.

This is going to start off sounding really obnoxious if it doesn't already. But, I have been wanting to spell this out for myself for a while. Just follow me here. My first recollection of being judged based on appearance was in high school. Or, it could be that I don't really remember anything before high school. Anyway, I remember early in high school feeling like people saw me as pretty. Knowing nothing about me, I would say that's what they thought off the bat. They may have also thought I seemed snobby. I was quiet and not really very involved. That means what people saw initially is often what they knew of me. To be clear, when I say people I am referring to strangers and the very surfacy acquaintance.

College judging had a completely different feel. People went to class in their pajamas for God's sake. Some were obviously walking in shame. Others went to football games as if it was a modeling competition. I remember thinking I could feel superficially judged, but really what was the point?

Fast forward to now. Honestly, the whole reason for this post is that I have realized something. Never in my life have I felt more judged than I have since having children. I'm not talking about your run of the mill absurd judgments like I am poisoning my child with formula. I'm purely speaking of the snap judgements made in public. If you are a parent of very young children you know that "public" can be a daunting place. Target, the grocery store, and every restaurant in town seem to send subliminal messages to toddlers that nows the time to make the world believe your mommy is completely incapable. But, in my experience it's not always based on the child.

The other day I went to the Big Green Egg store to get starters for our grill. Lila has a recent fear of giant blown up things with faces. This particular location has a giant blown up Big Green Egg with a face. I began to prepare myself for the disaster I was forcing upon our day. She panicked as we walked in, but once we were looking for the starters she was good to go. I decided to hold Evie instead of wear her because this was meant to be an in and out kind of stop. I found the starters, grabbed two boxes, and let Lila hold them to keep her occupied. I turned around and in a matter of seconds there were four other people in this smallish place. In an effort to be quick I rushed us to the counter to pay. In front of me was an elderly man who worked for The Make A Wish Foundation. He was trying to get the teenager behind the counter to get someone important to help him get a donation. Thankfully, the important person was not there and the conversation ended quickly. My kids are being more than well behaved as I fumble to get my wallet and pay. I turn around to see a rather attractive forty something guy in scrubs, another man a bit older in a very nice suit, and woman who could have been a grandmother. All were staring at me. Not at my children. But directly at me. The guy in scrubs actually looked me up and down. The guy in the suit noticed that I noticed that he was staring and quickly looked away. The grandmotherly woman gave me a big, fat, sympathetic smile.

When we got in the car I started to dissect the situation. Both of my children were very well behaved. Why were they staring? My body has clearly had two children. So Mr. Doctor was not checking me out. In fact, I felt an air of disgust. When we got home and got settled I went to the bathroom to check myself out. I had showered, but my hair was pulled up in not the most graceful fashion. I had on a UGA T-shirt that may or may not have had something food related on the sleeve. The rest of my ensemble consisted of jeans with flip flops. I had makeup on, but no mascara because I'm out. I looked very tired and bordered on disheveled.

This isn't an out of the ordinary situation. Would they have stared if I looked really put together? Maybe. What is it about a mom with multiple small children that draws stares and judgments so quickly. I don't know what they were thinking. It's just intriguing to me for some reason. Were they waiting for the meltdown? Were they thinking, "bless her heart"? I try to think about life before kids and what I would have thought. Knowing me I would have been looking at the kids and secretly gushing over how cute they were. Maybe I would have even been fantasizing about the day when I would be that mom.

Now, let's take this from a different angle. After checking myself out and thinking more about it I realized I had judged them too. It's highly possible they were looking at me because I had just turned around, they were all facing the counter waiting in line, and it just happened to be me they saw next. I judged the doctor thinking that because he was attractive and in scrubs (and wasn't looking at me so nicely) that he was arrogant and wealthy. For all I know he's a nurse or a tech and he has five kids of his own.

Either way, I'm curious if anyone else with kids feels more snap judgements from strangers just based on how they look at you. As I said, I believe things like this are just human nature. We all try to be so politically correct, but at the end of the day a tired mom of two crazy little girls probably warrants some stares ;-)