"Potty training and how I loathe it"

That post title comes straight from my list of of upcoming posts outlined back in January (yes I said "back in" because it is almost April folks!!!). I loathed it then and I have a feeling I will continue to feel it is the most obnoxious part of parenting from here forward. BUT, Lila is potty trained...mostly.

Here's the thing. All you brand new and fairly new parents listen up and please hear me when I say this...nothing you EVER do will EVER be the same as the way someone else did it. In fact, chances are it won't really even be close. You may seek advice. I would encourage it. But, at the end of the day what makes your child so uniquely perfect also makes them equally as different from every other kid. If you learn nothing else from me as a blogger please learn this. Money is not the root of all evil...comparing yourself to anyone else is.

As I take a flying leap from my soap box and get into the nitty gritty of our potty training experience, let me spell it out for you. Don't compare yourself to me. Not that I hold the key to all things parenting and you read this blog so that you can copy everything I do. I'm just saying... I tried to follow in the footsteps of the advice givers of other blogs, Facebook cries I made for help, and old fashioned neighborly examples. The pressure became too much. I needed to have a plan and I needed that plan to work. It just didn't happen that way.

While I tell you not to compare, I do want to share my thoughts, rants, and feelings about the topic so when it's happening to you or someone you know maybe you will think back and feel better about yourself and how your child is doing.

Here goes.

Lila is brilliant. I have said it before. I'm aware I'm her biased mother, but I feel I can say this frequently because I am not brilliant. I'm not tooting my own horn. I'm just stating a fact. With this brilliance comes an unfortunate level of expectation on my part that I am trying desperately to tone down. After all that I read and did in seeking out advice I was sure we would have this done in a day or two and walk away high fiving at how awesome we were. It seems that brilliance does not always coordinate with development. DUH.  But, at the time I was clueless and seeing signs.

Let me be clear about the whole "signs" aspect. There are lists upon lists of readiness signs you should see in your child. Things like waking up dry, telling you when they have pooped, and a general curiosity about the potty. When all of this started in the fall Lila had a handful of the signs going on. I would say about half of them actually. Stay with me as I completely contradict myself here. On the one hand I now feel that things have to go much more smoothly if your child shows almost all of the signs and then you start. On the other hand, Lila never once told me when she pooped and still doesn't wake up dry. She would have walked around covered in poop all day if I let her. You be the judge.

Then there's the whole aspect of who's the trainer and who's the trainee. Looking back I am almost sure that when we thought we were doing so well initially we were actually just training us and not her. We tried treats, stickers, and pee pee dances to keep the momentum going but at some point she just wasn't having it. We resolved to give up for a while and try again at a later date. We tried again and the same exact thing happened. She would get all excited and then hate it within two weeks.

I don't want to get into using treats versus not using them. I also don't want to get into the one weekend approach versus baby steps. I do not enjoy debating things that are simply personal choices. So how did it end up working out for us? We waited. We just waited and waited. On the second round of throwing in the towel we would wake up every day and ask her if she was going to wear a pull up or underwear that day. There was a lot of back and forth for a long time but the training aspect was deleted from the equation. If she wanted to do it, she would.

One day she just started choosing underwear more than pull ups. She randomly chose to go poop in the potty without telling anyone. I wanted to try again and seal the deal but I was so apprehensive. Somehow I had convinced myself that I had royally screwed her up. We used a sticker chart and within a week she didn't want the pull ups anymore. Once she started going to school in underwear it seemed that this was now the norm instead of accidents and changing pull ups. It seems this time she was actually ready and not just half ready.

She still wears a pull up or diaper to bed, but other than that she rarely has accidents. The day we got stuck in traffic and I pulled over to feed Evie and Lila frantically told me she had to go was the day I knew we were in the clear. She patiently went in the gas station and was such a big girl while mommy freaked out about how to keep her from touching anything. Do you know how hard that is?

Anyway, it's been a long road. My approach with Evie will probably be no approach at all. The second child (so I've heard) is always easier anyway. We shall see.  Evie is already trying to basically get in the toilet when anyone uses it so maybe we will start training her when she starts walking. HA!!!!!

On my toes

Today's post is an update about my adorably perfect children. This is a pretty loaded post so try to keep up. I thought about splitting it up, but time and the stream of thought I'm having aren't permitting that right now. Here goes.

From the minute Lila could talk I knew she was smart. I could see the wheels moving at the same rapid pace I see in Seth. From what I can tell, Evie is smart too...however, her smart seems to be more along the lines of sneaky. Street smart, if you will. Yes, I'm aware she's a baby.

The past week has marked the beginning of verbal communication from the littlest Burrow. She already says her version of Lila. I believe Lila was her first word and she has been saying it for a while. YA YA! She's right on target for her age in regards to the "drop the (insert noun) so that you can say uh oh!" game. In the drive through at Starbucks today she energetically held up her hand and yelled "HI!" to the person in the window. She repeats the word "ga!" very loudly when Molly comes around. This one took me a few days. Unfortunately, what she's really saying is "go!". When Molly gets in my face and licks me that's what I say...it seems I say it a little too often. Lastly, she is well aware of what the word no means even though I've only heard her say it once so far. I know she knows what it means because of the video below. There are two areas of the house I say, "no, no, no Evie" when she goes near them. The dog water/food bowls and the brick area and entertainment center in our den. She smiles and shakes her head, but it does seem to deter her from going near them. I'm sure that won't last long though.



To say that Evie has found her voice seems silly to me. Evie has had the most piercing, horror movie style scream since the day she was born. I'm pretty sure if I wasn't her parent I would be concerned that we were harming her in some way. You've seen her "singing" voice already, but since she so loves to show it off I had to share again...



How easy it is to forget the newness of things at this age. Each new word is like a light bulb going off! What's so spectacular about the second child is that they refresh your memory of these things with the first. I go to bed at night thinking about all the things I saw in Evie during the day and then remembering those same kinds of things with Lila. I guess this could also be considered a plus of having kids close together. It's got to be easier to remember :-)

In regards to other benefits of the second child I want to state for the record that I have made great strides in being less OCD as a parent. I feel I did Lila a huge disservice by being so particular about getting dirty. These days I don't really have the luxury of time to make sure everyone stays all clean. I am finding this VERY liberating. I think Lila is as well. And Evie is just happy to play with dirt...


My neighbors have a bit of a dip in their driveway where a puddle forms when it rains. One day the puddle became a mud puddle. We met outside to play and naturally the mud puddle became far more enjoyable than the plethora of outside toys. We played in the mud for quite a while and I just kept thinking I wish I had not waited so long to let Lila just get dirty.

Speaking of Lila, I don't really know how to comprehend that she will be three in a few months. Every day I see more of a three year old and less of the two year old. She's more logical and yet more imaginative. She's determined to do everything I do and yet do everything by herself. When Evie was fighting napping at all today, as she often does, I sat down with Lila at the kitchen table while she was eating a snack and put my head in my hands. I looked up to see her doing the same thing. Every gesture I made from there she copied. If I put my elbow on the table, scratched my head, or rested my head on my hand she was doing it. Typically this would be that stupid mocking game that people do to drive each other crazy. But she was sincerely doing it to see if she could imitate my gestures. It was priceless. She's on the verge of being potty trained (which will get it's own post). She's emotional and yet much more level headed than her early two year old self. Watching all of these stages is one of the best parts of parenthood.

One minute she's all business...


...and the next she just wants to be that little chubby faced one year old that got to be a duck for Halloween. Sigh.


With these new stages of development for everyone come similar stages of becoming this family of four instead of three. Evie has decided that the only fun things to play with in the house are the ones in Lila's possession at any given moment. This holds true for Carson as well. You can imagine that the two big sisters don't enjoy this very much (yes, Carson states frequently that Evie is her little sister too). There have been some physical altercations that have been hard to navigate. On the one hand, I have been the big sister. I know that intense frustration of feeling like nothing is yours anymore. I also now know what I wish I had known most of my life. The little sister adores the big one. Adore doesn't really even begin to cover it. And I'm not saying this as a way to toot my own horn. My mom told me most of my life that Sara thought I was the greatest thing that ever happened. I would laugh and shrug her off. But the way I see Evie look at Lila sort of breaks my heart. I don't know how to teach Lila to be everything she needs to be for Evie. I wasn't a good big sister. I would even go so far as to say I dropped the ball when my parents got divorced. We were so far apart in age and nothing was relatable until we were adults. I wish there was a way to convey to Lila how beneficial it would be for her to rise to the occasion. I'm working on it, but the sibling relationship is a tough one. It would be nice if they could just be like this forever...

on a roll!

It finally happened. I finally attempted to make bread. Honestly, I kind of feel like I cheated somehow. This no knead bread basically involved mixing, waiting, putting it in the oven, and taking it out. That's it. It tastes wonderful. It's a little heavy so I'm having a hard time imagining it used for a sandwich. It's a good thing bread is something Lila just asks to eat all by itself.

Below is the pin and here's the website I actually used. And, I don't have the fancy dutch oven she used.  I ended up reading through the comments and she actually mentions making it in a bread pan too. That's what I did. I am hoping this has opened the door to me being more confident about making bread without having to buy a bread machine! Wouldn't you know this one didn't make it to the "do it now" board either. The next one did though ;-)

Here's what mine looks like. I am sure there is entirely too much flour on it. I have an intense fear of making things that stick and then not being able to eat them.

This next one is something I have been meaning to do for a while. I paid around $4 for the inserts on this website to then realize I could probably have made them myself. However, $4 can be worth the time it takes to sit there and do that. I also feel that this binder is already kind of full. I love this concept though. This is on my "to do now" board along with a couple of other ways to organize paperwork type items in your household. It's a great start!

In regards to the "do it now" board, I'm not sure how to keep going with it. I can't decide if I want to delete the pins as I do them, comment on them that I did it and leave it there, or do nothing. Thoughts?

Stay tuned for a big post of Evie videos coming soon!

Best one yet

Before I get into our fantastic activity today, I have to say thank you to those of you who commented and/or messaged me somehow about my previous post. I got some really great suggestions and ideas which makes me wish I had said something earlier! I have decided to try out Nature's Garden Delivered . In fact, my first box comes on Tuesday. I chose this route due to two recommendations and, after further research, it fit my style better than other CSA's I have read about. Plus, they bring it to me! I even added one meat and two dairy items to my box. They don't have a big selection of meat and dairy so I'm going to see how that goes. My list for the grocery store is now very small and more than manageable. I'm very excited and will keep you posted.

Ok, I have been thinking about doing this pin for a while. The funny thing is, it's not actually on my "to do right now" pin board. I thought I had put it there, but it seems it's still under kid stuff. Regardless, I completed a pin. That's the goal! My dad came to visit last weekend and he brought Lila a set of fairy figurines. He actually purchased it when we were at Disney with him for the marathon. Once she had those I knew it was time.

Lila currently has two favorite movies. One of them is called Tinker Bell and the Great Fairy Rescue. To be quite honest, I have no idea how I chose this movie. It's on our Ipad. I remember buying it because Lila has always been drawn to Tinker Bell on things she has seen (hand me down pajamas specifically). It's a really cute movie if you haven't seen it :-) Anyway, she is obsessed with everything fairy related. When I saw this pin I knew we had to get it done. Here's the link for the website that created this.

Awesome right??? It took me a couple of weeks to wrap my brain around this one. I wanted to spend as little money as possible. I wanted to use things we had as much as possible. As it turns out I spent $6. Here's the run down:

- soil - $3.50
- two small plants - $2.50
- large container - the container we used actually used to hold ice and beer when we would have people over...ah, how times have changed
- assortment of stones and marbles - I already had a big bag of this stuff from planters and such. I made the table and chairs out of the stones and marbles using a hot glue gun as suggested on the website. Super easy!
- potpourri - I also had a bag of fallish potpourri that had some spiraly thing that looked like a tree. There were other random items that fit perfectly.
- ceramic containers - Both containers I just had somewhere in my house.
- signs - At Christmas I bought a set of very small alphabet stamps for a few dollars at Michael's. My goal was to make salt dough ornaments. Those turned out horribly. These little signs are just adorable!
- ceramic "beds" - This was a complete lucky find. We have a Primo grill (Big Green Egg family) and these little things came with it for some reason. They have just been on our deck taking up space.
- glass dish - Swimming pool!

We started off the day painting rocks. She got bored with that quickly and just started organizing them while I made the table and chairs and stamped the signs. She was VERY excited about the table and chairs. I kept telling her we were making her fairy garden, but I'm sure she had no idea what I was talking about. She kept telling me the fairies were coming to see her.

Here is the finished product! I really wanted moss but the crappy Home Depot in Tucker doesn't carry it. For now we will just have soil. I have a feeling that I enjoyed doing this more than she did. She was freaking adorable playing with it though.

The whole garden (before we expanded).

Lila decided this would be a bedroom. As you can see, Tinker Bell barely fits. This is actually one of those things where you put the tea candle in the bottom and it melts the wax on top to make your house smell good. Do those things have a name?

This is hysterical to me. These ladies are living it up! All they need is a margarita.

Lila made the biggest "room" available into the kitchen.

Overview

Here's the video that includes the expansion. So glad we did this!

A little help

First, I'm halfway through (give or take) about 5 pins as we speak. And I keep adding to the DO IT NOW pinboard. My name is Jana and I have a problem.

Anyway, what I really want to talk about is a bit of a downer. But, it's been on my mind a lot this week. Food. I grew up on Hamburger Helper and fried this or that (no offense mom). On both sides of the family food was a constant. We lived the typical Southern "you aren't happy unless you're well fed" mentality.

Fast forward to me feeding my own family and everything is organic with a touch of Chick-Fil-A and the Mexican place down the street. I painstakingly make dinner every night to the best of my recipe following ability. I want to like what I make, but I also want Seth and Lila to LOVE it. This never happens. Seth usually likes it. Lila usually doesn't. I have gone to great lengths to make things for Lila that she will eat that have real, wholesome ingredients. I make things into pancakes and cupcakes in the hopes that she will be fooled that the pancakes are made of zucchini and the cupcakes are made of quinoa (all of which are from Pinterest!). She's not. In fact, I could feed a small country with the amount of frozen items I have in my freezer right now that I made for her that she hated. Truth be told, I didn't much care for them either or they would be eaten already. I read "real food" blogs and look over their recipes that they say their kids love. Granted, I have a seriously picky eater. But still. I feel like something, someday will have to work.

Regardless, the state of the food industry baffles and disgusts me on a daily basis. I spent five minutes a few weeks ago fully convinced we were going vegan (I'm sorry Crystal...I can't do it). That's how much it distresses me. Truthfully, before I had kids I didn't care. Or maybe I just didn't know the immense amount of information I am privy to now. Either way, I would say ignorance is bliss. But then I would unknowingly be eating things like this.

I am trying to come to an agreement with myself about how I will raise my children in regards to food. I eat well now, but I am an overeater. However, I would rather overeat healthy foods than eat minimal amounts of garbage. Just sayin'. I want my girls to know what the super foods are that people in general don't buy. Maybe those things will be mainstream someday. One can dream.

So far, my agreement is that Whole Foods may have to be my new stomping ground. I simply can't do meat that's not organic anymore. More than that, I feel like most things need to be organic. But, I also can't go without meat because then I would be making two meals every night. I married a meat and veggies man. CSA's aren't accessible enough for me. My gardening skills suck (but I'm trying it again this year anyway!). The problem is, when I go in Whole Foods I feel conflicted. There's a sense of "does everyone know I can't afford to really shop here?" mixed with "I want to buy everything" with a healthy dose of "is it really necessary to buy organic flour at $9 a bag?". Ugh.

I've tried to shop at Kroger because they have a decent organic section. But their meats are awful. It then ends up that I am going here, there, and everywhere to get what I need at a price I can stomach.

My question to you is, if you lean towards the road to crunchy where do you shop? How do you do it? I'm willing to fork over the extra money for food that isn't laced with ammonia and/or hormones that comes from animals that aren't tortured. I guess I just need some input on how others handle it. Maybe you have suggestions or shopping tips that would make my life easier...?

one down

I said I picked the ones I knew I could do and do easily (mostly). I did this one and I stuck in a small pad of paper and a sheet of stickers too. Way better than the falling apart Ziploc that usually holds these items. Sorry for the short post. Have a good weekend!